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Adult Education / Internet: Click Here

Discover the opportunities on the Web -- for self-expression, self-aggrandizement, and self-abuse.

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WEB FEATS

If you already have a cell phone, a pager, and a Palm Pilot, all that you're missing is your own Web page. Ann McDermott teaches Web-page construction in her HTML design class at NYU, and Web virgins are welcome. One lawyer with three master's degrees was totally at sea his first day. "She was talking about 'chmod-ing,' " he recalls. "I'm saying, 'Hello! That sounds like a Hebrew dish.' I was lost." By the end of the semester, however, he had designed his own site, and he has since won awards for his online creations. Some students come to start a business, says McDermott; "others just think doing a Web page would be fun."

"HTML Workshop," ten sessions, Saturdays beginning October 3, 10 a.m. to 1 p.m.; $895. New York University, 48 Cooper Square (998-7190).

MIDAS TOUCHPAD

"Investment Basics" is a class in online personal investing that's offered, appropriately enough, only over the Internet, via cyberchat. "The future of investing is online," says Ron Miller, president of Plaatsdale Investment Advisors. "The Internet has helped level the playing field for the individual investor versus the professional. In the old days, the only people with access to a lot of information on different stocks were the brokers. Now anybody sitting at home with a computer can get price histories and information about companies. And they can trade. That's a real advantage."

"Investment Basics," nine weeks, beginning September 21; $390. The New School, www.dialnsa.edu (229-5880).

LOVE BYTES

Sex sites on the Web outdraw nearly all others, and a three-hour Learning Annex seminar on starting your own erotic business online promises to put the "adult" back into adult education. Under the guidance of erotic performer Jennifer Blowdryer (don't ask) and Linda E. Jacobs (author of Gummed on My Bum by My Mother-in-Law), you'll learn how to create, advertise, and sell your own adult site. "Sex sells," says Jacobs, and apparently anything goes. Well, almost anything: "There's no bestiality," she promises. "So if you're interested in making love to a sheep, you're out of luck."

"How to Make $$ in the Adult Business on the Net," September 16 or October 21; $39. The Learning Annex, 16 East 53rd Street (371-0280).


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