GORE
1. Ignore the national polls -- especially the recent ones -- that show you cutting into Bush's lead. But watch California. You were supposed to be able to take California's 54 electoral votes for granted, but private Democratic polling shows Bush chopping away at your lead there. That's expensive news. If you have to compete in California -- the most expensive media market on the planet -- you won't have the money or time to be as competitive as you need to be in the Midwest, where this campaign is going to be decided.
2. Turn to first-term Indiana senator Evan Bayh as your running mate -- he can cover you in the Midwest if you're forced to spend more time in California. Before winning his Senate seat with a 29-point margin of victory, Bayh was a budget-balancing, tax-cutting, job-creating Democratic governor of an extremely Republican state. He's got the kind of crossover appeal that you don't.
3. Speak Spanish. Bill Clinton won 70 percent of the Hispanic vote last election without being able to say anything in Spanish that he wasn't reading off a menu. Bush will cut into that margin, but you can't let him win this voting bloc. It's big enough -- and, more important, concentrated enough -- to be the deciding factor in a close election.
4. Don't apologize for launching those soft-money-financed "issue ads" last week in the battleground states, even though you sort of promised you wouldn't. So what if pundits are calling you a weasel. If you want to win, you have to make Bush seem like senior citizens' worst nightmare -- a threat to Social Security and Medicare. The issue ads do that better than anything you're going to say in speeches or debates. Sure, it would have been nice if you could have waited for Bush to run issue ads so you could claim he forced you to fight fire with fire. But he didn't, so hold tight and watch the ads do their magic.
5. Don't let Bush run a double reverse around the abortion issue. He's trying to convince pro-lifers he's going to appoint more Anton Scalias to the Supreme Court and trying to convince pro-choicers he's going to appoint more David Souters. This is an issue where two thirds of the American people agree. Make abortion rights the beginning, middle, and end of every speech. Make your campaign a pro-choice crusade.
6. Don't listen to anyone who wants you to change your personality. It could be better, but it's gotten you pretty far in politics already, and it sure turned out to be better than Bill Bradley's, didn't it? The public has already cast you as what you are: a studious, boring wonk. Even if you hired Letterman's entire writing staff, their material would come in too late to really change anyone's mind. So forget personality -- the only way for you to win this one is on the issues. Remember that most voters agree with you on most issues, so you should get the most votes. And keep your eye on California. If Bush manages to close the gap there, you're going to have to call a time-out and come up with a whole new offense.
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