The product No-Gas Giuliani is not, as you might suspect, a special antacid sold on the black market to cabdrivers, street vendors, and shaggy sidewalk artists suffering from mayorally induced gastrointestinal trauma. It is, rather, a leading antacid sold in Italy -- the Rolaids of Rome. It got us thinking about products that might help other New Yorkers suffering from mayoral agita.
NO-LEASH GIULIANI: Special device for city dog owners. Sensor attached to pet collar picks up presence of Parks officers so owners can slap on a leash fast.
NO-BOSS GIULIANI: Concrete pylons to be deployed across Tenth Avenue as last-ditch effort by desperate West Siders to block ground breaking for new Yankee Stadium.
NO-BUZZ GIULIANI: For drunk drivers fearing impoundment, a tincture designed to fool Breathalyzer tests.
NO-HEART GIULIANI: Protein-rich nutritional supplement for children of workfare participants.
NO-MORE GIULIANI: Powerful sedative for those who wish to sleep out balance of mayor's term.
Neil Patrick Harris in Sleep No More
Justin Davidson on Driving in New York
Idris Elba's Day Off 
Nitsuh Abebe on the Scissor Sisters
Look Book: Clara Zinovoy, Retiree
Hakkasan Is Ruby Foo’s for Rich People
A Modernist Beach House in Long Beach
Surveying Summer’s Cold-Brew Coffees
Obama’s Senior Strategists on Beating Romney 
Parents of Transgender Kids Face a Tough Decision
A New York Times Whodunit
The Secretive World of Supreme Court Clerks
Join the Discussion
Read All Comments | Add Yours
Recent Comments On This Article