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Summer in the City:
Festival of Lites

Skipping the Hamptons this year? Sounds good, but after the Puerto Rican Day Parade and Gay Pride, really, someone needs to think of stuff for city-bound folks to do. Here, the summer festivals we'd like to see . . .

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  • Can't get a seat at Shakespeare in the Park? Plenty of tickets are still available for Shakespeare in the 64th Street Duane Reade and Shakespeare in the Line Outside of Lot 61.

  • Your brain didn't go on vacation, either! Check out the Maxim Literary Festival, featuring discussions and readings by Cindy Margolis, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Tom Green, Jewel, and Lillian Ross.

  • Get ready for Paul Simon in Central Park! He's not performing, but can usually be found sunning himself in the Sheep Meadow. Approach with caution.

  • Outdoorsy types will love Taste of New York, a three-month-long alfresco feeding frenzy for New York mosquitoes. (May be canceled on account of spraying.)

  • Take a stroll with the Silicon Alley Walking Tour, which features stops at empty lofts, reconverted warehouses, and Josh Harris's apartment.

  • Since this season isn't all about having fun, don't miss Scared Straight!: Upper West Side, a field trip during which liberals visit Al Sharpton in jail, where he frightens them with tales of his "Vieques-celent" adventures.

  • New York is eBook Country!: This festival does not exist.

  • And last but not least, don't forget to attend the Paris and Nicky Hilton Open House.

modernhumorist.com


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