Barnie Sandlers — Yes, ‘Barnie Sandlers’ — Is the Meme Enthusiast’s Choice for President

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As the presidential race heads into the first round of primaries and candidates do their best to woo voters, one major demographic has been largely overlooked: dank memers. (Dank memers are the patriotic, voting Americans who love and make memes, especially “dank” — good — ones.) Which candidate will pledge to increase our national store of memes? Who can best promise to increase our slipping rates of meme dankness? Who can ensure American meme hegemony while facing the rapid rise of Russian, Indian, Brazilian, and Nigerian memes? As far as Facebook’s top memers are concerned, there’s only one candidate: Barnie Sandlers.

Yes, you read that right. Barnie Sandlers is the only candidate speaking directly to memers, promising the dankest possible memes as we face a new century of American meme-making.

#FeelTheBarn #SocialistMemerMan #2spicy4u #spicyrepost

Posted by Barnie Sandlers on Thursday, November 19, 2015

I may seem a grumpy, old curmudgeon at times, but I assure you that I would rather not waste my time being pissed off. And I would rather that you didn't either.#FeelTheBarn #SimmerDownNow #BrowseSomeMemes

Posted by Barnie Sandlers on Friday, November 13, 2015

We must fix this.#MakeFalloutReleaseWeekANationalHoliday #FeelTheBarn #Barnstorm2016

Posted by Barnie Sandlers on Tuesday, November 10, 2015

If you take a look at my life’s work, and what my agenda is today, there is one candidate who is prepared to stand up to...

Posted by Barnie Sandlers on Monday, November 2, 2015

I have led the fight for exclusively patrician meme sites since day one.#HaveYouFeltTheBarnYet #PleaseFeelTheBarn #ImBarningImBarningImBarningForYou

Posted by Barnie Sandlers on Wednesday, October 21, 2015

His foremost opponent? Anti-meme reactionary Dolan J. Tramp.

look at this chart and tell me y u wouldnt vote 4 me, dolan.... huh why??????????? ?????

Posted by Dolan J. Tramp on Wednesday, September 2, 2015

Who will you vote for?