Coordinated National ‘Men’s Rights Meetups’ Will Create Wormholes of Deep Embarrassment at IHOPs Around the World This Weekend

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Are you ready for “International Tribal Meetup Day”? It doesn’t really matter if you are, because it’s happening anyway — this Saturday, all around the world, at 8 p.m.

International Tribal Meetup Day” is the brainchild of Roosh Valizadeh, better known as RooshV, among the most successful and best known of the loose community of social incompetents that have banded together online as MRAs — Men’s Rights Activists. MRAs are generally aspiring pickup artists and aggrieved men who believe that masculinity itself is under attack. That’s not an exaggeration; the topic is often discussed in military terms. As an MRA ringleader writes of the gatherings, “While many of you certainly have normal friendships, chances are those friends are moderates who may not be dependable in times of crisis, and who may not defend you if a hostile enemy approaches.” So the event is a chance for these MRAs to meet up offline and, I guess, best figure out how to harass women. 

A few dozen men have signed up to organize local meetups. The plan is to meet in a public place around 8 p.m. local time and wait around for 20 minutes while other men cautiously approach and say the secret code phrase, and then move to a bar or something.

Yes, there is a code phrase:

To identify your fellow tribesmen, ask the following question to a man you suspect is there for the meetup: “Do you know where I can find a pet shop?” If you are asked this question, answer in the affirmative: “Yes, it’s right here.” You can then introduce yourself and get details about where to proceed at 8:20. If you ask someone for the pet shop and they appear confused or actually try to direct you to a real pet shop, they’re not there for the meetup.

So if you see a group of handsome, strong MRAs gathered in an IHOP parking lot on Saturday, do not be alarmed! Maybe feel a little depressed, though. This whole endeavor is depressing. (Full disclosure: I am a beta.)

Here are the top ten MRA meetup locations:

  1. Bangor, Maine: “Bangor Public Library, in front of main entrance below the stairs”
  2. Rochester Hills, Michigan: “Elizabeth Park, beside center bush”
  3. Redwood City, California: “Parking lot of IHOP
  4. San Antonio, Texas: “In front of main door of the Alamo”
  5. Charlottesville, Virginia: “Lee Park, beside the statue of [Robert E.] Lee”
  6. Novosibirsk, Russia: “Next to the statue of Vladimir Lenin on Lenin Square”
  7. Seattle, Washington: “Statue of Lenin”
  8. Phnom Penh, Cambodia: “The royal palace in front of main entrance”
  9. Dubai, UAE: “Dubai Mall, in front of Tim Horton”
  10. Boston, Massachusetts: “Paul Revere Statue in Paul Revere Mall”

No surprise, there is chatter online about disrupting the meetups.