Dril Should Be Trump’s Vice-President

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As likely Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump heads toward the general election, the chattering classes have turned to the pressing question: Who will be his running mate?

One dark-horse possibility: @Dril, the pseudoynmous, Jack Nicholson–avatared Weird Twitter hero/demigod. Dril’s arrival on the national scene several years ago spouting incoherent, libidinous, authoritarian comment-spam presaged — and, arguably, predicted — Trump’s success as a presidential candidate. It’s hard to think of a potential vice-president who would align so closely with Trump on core issues of national security, patriotism, and soda.

Don’t believe us? Look at how closely Trump and Dril line up when it comes to the issues facing real Americans.

Soda

Intelligence

Freedom of speech

ISIS

Angry protesters

Relationships and infidelity

Rap music

Golf

Beans

Independence Day

Mexican food

The American flag