These Guys Want to Raise $20,000,000 to ‘Fix Dorne’ on Game of Thrones

By
Photo: HBO

Game of Thrones, like the book series on which it’s based, is wonderful but also frequently incredibly exasperating. This Kickstarter wants to do its part to fix that.

Disappointed in the HBO show’s muddled depiction of the region of Dorne and its ruling family the Martells? Frustrated by the clichéd and one-dimensional characterization of the Sand Snakes — who, in the book, are compelling, fascinating, and distinct characters?

Got $20,000,000?

Fixing Dorne Productions” says that if its Kickstarter reaches its $20,000,000 goal, it will “patch” the unfortunate Dorne plotline of last season:

Instead of being met with the convenient delivery of clothes and horses sufficient to somehow transport [Jamie and Bronn] into the most guarded location in the entire kingdom, our intrepid duo instead find themselves in a half-familiar culture that has every reason to distrust them.

Meanwhile, our Sand Snakes are introduced in a style closer to George RR Martin’s - as diverse as their mothers, and written as more than just catty comic relief. Obara, Nymeria, and Tyene Sand will be distinct characters - and Ellaria Sand will be torn between her patriotism, her slain lover’s memory, and her desire for vengeance.

(Who is “Fixing Dorne Productions”? A small group of directors, actors, and illustrators, including “a principal question writer for the official Game of Thrones trivia boardgame.”)

And there’s more! If they reach $20.5 million, they’ll hire Alexander Siddig to re-create his role as Doran Martell (and, hopefully, give him a lot more to do this time). If they reach $30 million, they’ll “extend an offer of seven million dollars to the charity of George R. R. Martin’s choice” to encourage the creator to name this depiction the “canon” adaptation. For $40 million they’ll hire “highly experienced directors and producers” as their own replacements! And for $50 million they’ll bring Ned Stark back from the dead!

It’s time to fix Dorne. Make your contribution today.