Ohio College Installs 24-Hour Pizza ATM So Everyone Can Know You Vape

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In a feat of technical innovation only rivaled perhaps by the wheel or the escalator, Xavier University has installed a pizza ATM that will dispense $9 pies to its student body all day long.

The machine, (which retails for $55,000, not including the price of stocking it with pizzas) hold 70 pizzas at a time. They’re pre-made by the University’s dining staff and when someone buys one from the ATM, the pizza is moved from a refrigerator and cooked in a convection oven. The whole process takes about three minutes. Which is, admittedly, a pretty excellent pace to get you a slice if it’s 4 in the morning and you’re, well, if it’s 4 in the morning and you really just need some pizza.

According to Xavier assistant vice-president Jude Kiah, pizza ATMs have a long and storied history over in Europe. (Makes mental note to move.) But this is the first to come to the States. I’d hazard a guess that at $9 and three minutes, these aren’t going to be the best pizzas the world has ever tasted. But there’s definitely something to be said for convenience.