Until you use one, a bidet seems faintly ridiculous. Then you go on a ten-day vacation to Japan — or Europe, but let’s be honest, Japan is where you’ll be converted — and just the thought of coming home to your analog toilet becomes so … uncivilized. Such was the position I found myself in a few years ago, and while I wasn’t ready to dive headfirst into a Toto Japanese washlet (which, to be fair, isn’t so crazily expensive), I was ready to upgrade the toilet in my apartment.
Some Amazon research led me to the Bio Bidet BB-600, which sported all the features of a fancy bidet without the crazy price tag. I’ll spare you the details of installation, but even for an astonishingly unhandy person, it was surprisingly easy; you need only 30 minutes and some plumber’s tape to prevent any possible leaks.
Once installed, the thing does more than a person could ever want it to. You can adjust the water in all the ways water can be adjusted — move it forward or back, make it hotter or colder, raise or lower its pressure. Of all its pulse settings (massaging, aerating, even one for kiddos), the cleansing one is the most practical for everyday situations. And while I wouldn’t advise foregoing toilet paper completely, you will find that you end up using much less of it. Not to get all Marie Antoinette, but I only wish the heated seat were a little warmer.
Whenever I have a friend over, I can always tell when they’re about to indulge in the BB-600. It’s usually well into the night, after a few glasses of wine, when they totter toward the bathroom — and spend an unusual amount of time there. We’re all too polite to talk about it right then, but I’ll get the text a day or two later: “Your toilet is amazing.”
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