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34 (Funny, Unusual, Artful, Tasteful) Valentines You Can Buy on Amazon

No matter what your (or your partner’s) vibe is.

No matter what gift you give for Valentine’s Day, a card should accompany it — instead of something you can grab at a drugstore, why not elevate with something a little more special (no offense meant, but we’ve banned anything Hallmark or American Greetings from this list). Amazon has a surprising number of cards whether you’re looking for something tasteful or artsy or slightly naughty — they’re so cheap, you can afford to toss a few in your basket and pass them out to friends, friends’ kids, or that nice receptionist Mildred.

Funny & Punny Valentines

Rifle Paper You’re a Fox Card
$19 for 8 at Amazon

A sweet card from Florida-based Rifle Paper Co. Not since Robin Hood has an illustrated fox looked so handsome.

Lick Me Till Ice Cream!
$4 at Amazon

The old “ice cream/I scream” pun does it every time.

Pizza Love Card
$5 at Amazon

Sweet for couples whose idea of a romantic evening is a large pepperoni.

Woman Goosing Husband Card
$3 at Amazon

A cute sentiment — flirting while doing chores into our golden years! — for a couple of any age.

You Otter Be With Me Card
$7 at Amazon

These are made of wood, so they’re on the pricier side, but the illustrations and puns are worth it. (There’s also “I Whale Love You” and “I Love You a Whole Latte.”)

Drama Llama Postcard Book — Set of 12
$12 at Amazon

This book of postcards has plenty of puns for every type of valentine, including your “palentine,” all illustrated with adorable llamas.

Crafty Valentines

Papyrus Happy Valentine’s Day Embellished Valentine’s Cards (Chocolate Bar Love Card)
$16 at Amazon

Touch the chocolates and you’ll notice they’re raised on the paper — and prettier than anything you could get at Godiva.

Flower and Vase Pop-up
$10 at Amazon

The paper bouquet on this card doesn’t give you much room to write, but the intricately designed flowers should do most of the talking anyway.

Lovepop Lovers in Dogwood Tree Pink Valentine’s Day Card
$13 at Amazon

A delicate scene of a couple under cut-out dogwood blossoms.

Hunger Handmade 3D Pop-up Rose Flower Card
$10 at Amazon

No matter how long your relationship lasts, this paper pop-up rose will certainly never lose its bloom.

Lovepop Love Toaster Valentine’s Day Pop-up Card
$13 at Amazon

For something less literal, here’s a pop-up Valentine’s Day card featuring two slices of bread popping out of a toaster.

Paper Spiritz 3D Pop-up Birdcage Greeting Card
$6 at Amazon

So, not exactly a card per se, but how precious is this birdcage tableau? You can write a message on the table right next to the other valentines propped up.

Unusual Valentines

Bloomin Mini Pink Heart-Shaped Seed Card
$14 at Amazon

Flower seeds are packed in a thin layer of compostable paper — put them in some dirt and watch the plants sprout.

DIY Recordable I Love You Card
$17 at Amazon

Record up to 90 seconds of yourself saying “I love you” to your partner — or of Whitney Houston from a computer speaker.

Jumbo Bear Card
$40 at Amazon

This giant bear card is two feet by three feet (check the price) and would be the ideal accompaniment to a Valentine’s Day gift of, say, a convertible.

Valentines Meant for Kids, But Great for Adults

Flying Airplane Valentines
$15 at Amazon

What adult man (or woman, for that matter) wouldn’t want to turn a valentine into an airplane?

Valentines Cards for Kids: A Creative Valentine Card Exchange Coloring Book
$10 at Amazon

This kids’ coloring book is therapeutic way for adults to make personalized cards, too.

Scratch & Sniff Strawberry Valentines
$13 at Amazon

Strawberry-scented scratch-and-sniff cards (there’s chocolate, too) will bring ‘em back to elementary school.

Hello Kitty Valentines With Glitter Tattoos
$4 at Amazon

These Hello Kitty valentines include glitter temporary tattoos for both kids and hipsters alike.

iBaseToy Valentine’s Day Cards for Kids
$13 at Amazon

Whether you love someone a latte or just want to wish them a yummy Valentine’s Day.

Peaceable Kingdom Funny Valentine 28-Card Super Packs, in Cootie Catcher
$13 at Amazon

These cootie catchers are DIY valentines, fortune tellers, and if nothing else, a way to spark a conversation.

Valentine Cards — 12-Pack
$11 at Amazon

Instead of handing out packs of Sweethearts, hand out cards that look like Sweethearts.

Wonka Lik-m-aid Fun Dip Valentine Mystery Flavor 24 Card Pouches
$14 at Amazon

Or you could just give out candy.

Super Mario Bros Valentine Cards With Gold Coins (for 24 Kids)
$20 at Amazon

If your kid’s in a treat-free classroom because of allergies, these Super Mario Brothers valentines come with gold coins …

32 Magical Unicorn Trendy Valentine’s Day Sharing Cards With Tattoos
$9 at Amazon

… While these unicorn valentines come with glittery tattoos.

Retro & Vintage Valentines

Vintage Valentines
$10 at Amazon

Retro valentines from the ’50s and ’60s repurposed for today are way too adorable.

Vintage Valentines (Press Out Book)
$5 at Amazon

You can punch out these mini-valentine cards from the pages of this book from Golden Books (which you might know as the publisher of The Poky Little Puppy).

Victorian Valentines: Postcard Book
$10 at Amazon

Send a Victorian postcard to your Brontë-obsessed valentine.

M2381VDG-B1x10 All Decked Out: 10 Assorted Valentine’s Day Cards
$10 at Amazon

This set of Valentine’s Day cards is inspired by vintage playing cards.

Lucca Paperworks Anatomical Heart Love Card
$7 at Amazon

For the valentine who takes hearts literally.

Blank-Inside Valentines

Crane & Co. Ecru Notes
$21 at Amazon

If you’re of the mind that the only note to be given should be on clean, heavy-stock, ecru paper, trust these from Crane & Co.

Love Note Cards
$13 for 24 at Amazon

These aren’t strictly valentines-themed, but who wouldn’t love charming renderings of elephants, owls, and cupcakes adorned with hearts?

Valentine Floral Heart Note Cards by Rifle Paper Co. — Set of 8 Cards
$16 at Amazon

Perfect for friends, this blank card gets the sentiment across without being cloying about the whole thing.

Women in Love Greeting Cards
$3 at Amazon

Because why should greeting cards be strictly for men and women?

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34 Funny and Unusual Valentines You Can Buy on Amazon