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Kirk Cameron holds to keys to all mysteries.
"The Most Trusted Name in News just got a whole lot more trusting."
Last names? Where we're going, we don't need last names!
That means he probably doesn't know about ours, either.
Is Anderson Cooper a new gay-rights crusader?
"And I don't do a lot on a first date, but if you behave and you're charming, there may be a second and who knows?"
This is the second least plausible cover for a foray into plushie-ism we have ever heard in our lives.
Well, when you put it that way, now we're interested!
"Because the only thing more stupid than being eaten would be being eaten and not having the videotape."
'Times' says CBS has talked with Cooper about the job.
The studly CNN anchor is moving into a place equipped with brass poles and hoses.
Really, CNN? Really?
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