Hope you like Ashton Kutcher!
"What I'm trying to do is make a point with my record and look consistent."
He's a pirate.
Because it's bad.
Plus: Cary Elwes gets frisky with Natalie Portman.
Women who marry younger men may die sooner, according to science.
What Ashton Kutcher, Martha Stewart, and Twitter founder Jack Dorsey had to say.
Because this is madness.
And more celebrity breakups, meltdowns, and heartfelt moments, in our daily gossip roundup.
Not the one starring Justin Timberlake, that's for sure.
Plus: Miranda Cosgrove is a very, very rich teenager.
Also, Demi Moore wore a Donna Karan look the day after it walked the fall 2010 runway.
Ashton Kutcher and Katherine Heigl's retread of a classic plot.
Come on, dude, it's officially two months after we were supposed to have forgotten your name. Give us something, or it's all over.
Plus: What does Ellen really think of Simon?
Just go gently into that gimmicky night.