But the first half is sort of interesting.
Featuring: one bedazzled caftan.
About a girl who has to decide whether to live or die.
And then making it all bloody. For Carrie.
She learned when she was a preteen.
Up-to-the-minute updates on what the stars are wearing.
Does every grim-sounding script land on her desk, or what?
The would-be high school sophomore just wants to be covered in fur and Miu Miu.
She looked like a powder-blue cupcake, with just a hint of rebel.
Who had balls on his neck? Who crapped on his real-life wife?
She's just a girl. An impossibly bloody one.
It's a bloody good time.