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Conservative Sops

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Giuliani Eats Up Sandwich Man’s Cheesy Signs

You're an ex–New York City mayor running for president, and your opponents accuse you of being too soft on illegal immigration. Of course you're soft on illegal immigration — how else would you have run New York? Sadly, that line of reasoning is not going to play well in the kind of town where they haven't seen a Mexican since Charlton Heston played one in Touch of Evil, which is precisely the kind of town you need to win over. What do you do?