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A Restaurant World ‘Howl’

A reader sent us this Ginsbergian screed earlier this week, which struck us as a perfect snapshot of the restaurant world, circa summer 2007. We leave you now for the holiday weekend. Enjoy!
DanYelle as a restaurant critic? Anne Burell shticking it up in the kitchen with a skirt with horsies on it? David Chang morphing from shy nice smiley ramen guy to F-bomb dropping Esquire spread noodle mob boss? Johnny Iuzzini in a meringue body stocking? Tattoos as the new talent. Top Chef as the new Michelin. Glorified fryers, grass fed peaches, 1,000 day meat. I mean, it’s as if we are all now Cracker Jacks ripping open the next prize every time we open a menu. It's always going to be a disposable toy. Or wash-off ink. It's a 3 onion ring circus, this industry. We have our freaks and our clowns and our daredevils and our bearded ladies. It's "I invented the lobster roll and that white wicker chair to sit on while you eat it." Huh? It's sellouts: Bertoli, Starbucks, Target, FreshDirect, Appleby’s. It's all hypocritical: Eat fresh … and then buy my frozen dinner meals. Hitchcock would have tapped into a whole new genre with the horror of the food world.
An Appalled Spectator

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Broken Social Scene Get Sociable; Feist Gets Feisty

Brendan Canning, one of the two founding members of Canadian supergroup Broken Social Scene, cracked several tired jokes about people swimming in the waterless pool, before changing tacks and heckling a fan who was talking on his cell phone. Kevin Drew, Canning’s more focused half, had to cut him off several times so they could move on with the set.

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Ron Burkle’s Village Woes Just Beginning

Ron Burkle
Billionaire Ron Burkle's gotta be regretting buying Sky Studios, the spectacular Village penthouse that was formerly a glamorous event space. A judge just ruled that brides-to-be who had previously reserved it for weddings can still use the multi-tiered apartment (which has a rooftop pool) for their nuptials — even though Burkle now owns the space and is presumably itching to move in (or make it nice and sell it). The Post reported that he plans to make it a residential palace. But we're thinking that Burkle will have other reasons to regret the purchase. Last time Daily Intel was there, managers told us that the reason it was turned into an event space instead of a private home was that leakage, heating, and structural problems (not to mention unfabulous service-elevator access) made it virtually unlivable. Though, frankly, for our own rooftop pool in the summer, we'd live in a yurt for the rest of the year. Wedded Diss to Bliss [NYP]

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American Girls Are Back on the Runways

USA
We've seen two waves of model nationalism in the last five years: first, the Brazilian glamazons, led by Gisele, and then alien-eyed waifs from the Eastern Bloc, led by Sasha Pivovarova. But the runways this Fashion Week are going to look less like the U.N. and more like high school.

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The New Cold War: Fro-Yo Standoff in Flushing

Fro-Yo Map
The Frozen-Yogurt Wars have intensified in Flushing. We spotted two new stores going up a mere 85 feet from each other on Roosevelt Avenue. Does Pinkberry have the advantage, being so close to the heavily trafficked Main Street stop on the 7 train? Or will the discriminating dessert aficionado bypass the throngs (by walking about 40 steps) to Red Mango? Too soon to tell, but we fear New York’s post-apocalyptic future where the only structures standing are bank branches and frozen-yogurt stores. Oh, and the Arepa Lady. —Aileen Gallagher Earlier: Our coverage of the frozen-yogurt invasion

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‘Times’ Wants College Students to Turn Down That Damned Music

Newspapers face all sorts of problems, not insignificant among them that younger people don't so much read the paper. Then today we saw the cover story of the "Metro" section, "Welcome, Students. Now Watch It," geared toward the college students — and, we should think, potential new Times readers — newly arrived in the city. It includes such useful tips as "Don't fall asleep on the subway," "Don't play chess for money with the hustlers in Washington Square Park," and "Don't drink too much beer and use the street as a toilet." Plus, this gem, from the end of the "Don't light up in a bar" tip: "And besides, if you’re not 21, you shouldn’t be in a bar anyway." We have no idea why "Make sure to clean your room" and "Just say no" weren't included as tips, but, yeah, we think we understand why kids don't read the paper. Welcome, Students. Now Watch It [NYT]

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