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Because why make it easy?
The governor just officially announced that he will not run for his office again.
But Rudy, for some reason, isn't returning his calls.
Oh God, more oversharing.
"I didn't sign up for this," the governor told a luncheon yesterday.
His blindness. Just kidding! His BLACKNESS.
Instead, he's spending it on booze and fancy dinners. And consultants who are paid to get people to like him.
The "tortoise and the hare" campaign approach appears to be very popular this year.
Of course, it's not really that straightforward.
It can't be because of all that great work he's done busting bonuses on Wall Street.
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