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Stephon Marbury Makes Everybody Look Bad in Isiah Thomas Trial

Stephon Marbury
The Daily News and Post are reveling in yesterday's tawdry developments in the Isiah Thomas sexual harassment trial. Knicks star Stephon Marbury took the stand and revealed that he pressured a college intern into having sex with him in a car outside of a strip club. Also, he called the case's plaintiff, Anucha Browne Sanders, "a bitch" and dismissed her importance with the team. Sanders testified that when she complained about all of this to Madison Square Garden president Steve Mills, he threatened to spread rumors about her and another executive. We have two thoughts about this. One, we are zero percent surprised. Two, for God's sake, the Knicks have to settle this case. A hefty monetary gouge will force team brass to crack down on this disgusting behavior, and if they don't get this out of court, the team is inevitably going to get dragged through endless muck. And more importantly, we don't know if we can handle another Andrea Peyser column about "sloppy seconds." Sleaze Play [NYDN] Scoring Machine [NYP]

Beard Papa Returning Downtown, May Hit the Slope

Beard Papa
We promised to launch an official investigation into the mysterious closing of Beard Papa’s East and West Village locations, and, although a disconnected signal at the latter didn’t bode well, an email from COO Craig Takiguchi is more than reassuring. “We are meeting with folks in Park Slope and Bronxville,” says Takiguchi. “I suspect we will find a good location in either of those two areas sometime this year.” As for the closed stores:

First They Came for Wendy's

Eat Me
It feels uncool to side with the Fast Food Nation team in the seemingly endless battle to get fast-food restaurants to list the calories of their meals on super-size, super-visible posters, a hullabaloo that at this point has accumulated more headlines than General Petraeus. But Bloomberg’s zeal is not just putting us off our hamburger, it’s kind of creeping us out. “Anyone who thinks we’re going to walk away from trying to tell the public what they’re eating and what it’s doing to them doesn’t understand the obligation this city’s Health Department has,” he said earlier today. “We have to tell people how to lead better lives.” Hizzoner is going back to Boston for the holiday, we’re told by his people, and no doubt he’s enjoying the lean cut of brisket and fat-free kugel prepared especially for him by loving Mama Charlotte. In Tug of War on Calories, Mayor Pushes for Amended Rule [NYT]

Sheena Was a Punk-Rocker

Neon was the buzzword this week, landing on nearly every runway. But a few crafty designers reinterpreted that late-eighties trend into something distinctively more punk.

And on 9/12, Giuliani Tanked

Rudy Giuliani
It may be because this month's remembrances of the World Trade Center attacks drew voters' attention to all of the holes being poked in Rudy Giuliani's terrorism résumé. Or it may be because in August several long profiles of him appeared in serious journals, making him out to be sort of a jerk. Or, it may even be because the Republican candidate's daughter just started classes at Harvard, which is a campaign kiss of death. But for whichever reason, Giuliani sunk in the polls today, breathing new life into John McCain's campaign and giving encouragement to newcomer Fred Thompson. He's not doing so hot in early primary states, either. The dip, from polls in June, shows a campaign popularity matrix that mimics Giuliani's own personality. Strong at times, but erratic and plagued by insecurity. And, you know, prone to self-immolation. Which reminds us of a question we've been pondering for a long time: The Republicans are rooting for Hillary to win the Democratic nomination because they can't wait to see her implode when she faces the whole nation. So why aren't the Democrats rooting for Rudy for the same reason? Rudy's Support Slipping in Multiple Polls [TPM]

Someone Acts Like a Fugging Baby at Hilfiger

Just for fun, let’s try a blind item for you gossip aficionados. Which ubiquitous, young(ish) singer didn’t get seated with the other cool kids at Tommy Hilfiger’s show and spent the entire production pulling a completely petulant bitchface?

Dani Is Done With Dinner Service Forever

Contrary to recent reports, Dani is not in danger of closing, but when the restaurant reopens on September 17, there will be a major shift: Owner Don Pintabona tells us there will no longer be any dinner service. “It’s going to be all events, corporate dinners, and parties,” he says. “I already have a bunch of weddings, bar mitzvahs, and other stuff lined up.”

Chloë Sevigny Designs the Clothes of Her Dreams

Have you ever wondered what happens when celebrities make random pronouncements in the press about who they'd like to date or which director really needs to give them a job? Well, if you're Chloë Sevigny, you get to design a clothing line.

And You Thought Your Rent Was High!

Sting and Trudie
Housing costs are becoming more and more difficult to bear for normal people, but the absurdly rich seem to be faring just fine. DealBook is reporting that, according to a filing with the City of New York, Sanford Weill, former CEO of Citigroup acquired a $42.4 million penthouse in 15 Central Park West where presumably, he will conduct his business of orchestrating the end of the world. In their new digs, the Weills will have access to a private dining room, a walnut-paneled library, a screening room, and a chauffeurs' waiting room, although they'll have to pony up some extra cash if they want a wine-storage area or a maid's suite — those are sold separately! Let's hope the walls are thick enough that no one has to overhear neighbors Sting and Trudie having Tantric sex. Weill Pays 42 Million For Chic New Address [DealBook/NYT] Past Perfect" [NYer]

AvroKO's New Restaurant Poised to Hit Bond Street

Adam Farmerie
AvroKO, the architectural and restaurant team behind Public, is planning to open a new eatery at 26-28 Bond Street, not far from Ian Schrager’s forthcoming condos at 40 and 48 Bond. Unlike Forty Deuce, they received the go-ahead (albeit in a split decision, after much debate) from CB2’s business committee last night. AvroKO’s Adam Farmerie filled us in on his plan for the 100-seat restaurant, under the working name Superior.

Trader Joe's Wants You … to Vaseline Your Teeth

Bay Ridge: They're saying that Representative. Fossella hasn't come through on promises to help save a beautiful Methodist church from being razed for condo development. [Queens Crap] Coney Island: We are increasingly intrigued by Rose, the compellingly coiffed lady who delivers terse morning weather reports on this blog from a tower high atop Coney. Let's hear more about Rose! [OTBKB] Dumbo: Looks like yuppies and Farragut Houses residents alike will be rubbing shoulders over toothpaste and T.P. at the "New Pharmacy Coming Soon!" to Gold Street. [Brownstoner] Forest Hills: If you're an ambitious, adventurous, values- and people-oriented foodie who smiles easily, then the new Trader Joe's here wants you! [Forest Hills 72] Harlem: With HIV infections in the city's young gay men up a third since 2001, the biggest jump in that group is here and East Harlem. Come on, brothas and papis — and Chelsea boys too, for that matter — rock the cock sock! [NYS] Long Island City: Sounds like there's an itty-bitty park planned for that waterfront lot at the end of Vernon Boulevard. Nice. [LICNYC] Melrose: Who's going to plunk down $25 mil to buy the fabulously rococo, former Bronx County Courthouse? And what'll they use it for? [Curbed]

A Sweater Lovely as a Tree

Isabel Berglund's cuddly City of Stitches should be the avant-garde mascot for environmentalist types the world over (though we suspect they’d oppose to the cotton medium — is there such a thing as soy yarn?), and pretty much the only tree we'd ever actually hug.

Magnolia to Lure Cupcake Crazies to the Upper West Side

Chelsea: Trestle on Tenth launches weekend brunch this Saturday with a fall menu that includes bacon-and-onion rösti and banana-stuffed French toast with vanilla syrup. Fort Greene: IHOP is making more New York moves: In addition to taking on Times Square, the chain will open an outlet on Livingston Street near Bond Street. [NYDN] Midtown East: Bloomingdale's has moved tangy fro-yo pioneer Forty Carrots from the basement to a larger, more befitting seventh floor space. [NYT] Sherry-Lehmann wine store has completed its relocation to Park Avenue at 59th Street. [NYT] Red Hook: You may have missed LeNell’s absinthe tasting (she drinks it up by the way), but she’ll host a tequila tasting this Sunday in honor of Mexican Independence Day. [LeNell’s] Upper West Side: A second Magnolia bakery will open on 69th Street at Columbus this winter, and owner Steve Abrams thinks he can keep it a secret from tourists. [Eater] Juan Cuevas has left Blue Hill to be the chef de cuisine at Ed Brown’s Eighty One, which should open in December. [NYS]

‘Eastern Promises’ to Showcase Viggo Mortensen's Junk

Viggo Mortensen
Viggo Mortensen goes full frontal in a knife fight scene in new David Cronenberg Russian Mob flick Eastern Promises. At the premiere, Cronenberg told New York that Mortensen suggested the nudity himself when they choreographed the scene, which takes place in a bathhouse. "He said, 'You know, it's obvious I'm going to have to do this naked.' And I said, 'Great.' That was pretty much the discussion," Cronenberg said at a screening after-party at the Soho Grand. "If he had had this towel wrapped around him that never moved, you would've noticed that. But this was so real." [Ed. note: Then where did he hide his knife??]