Hollywood fathers, lock up your daughters.
And more things you don't need to but kind of want to know about celebrities, in our daily gossip roundup.
The recently rehabbed starlet was spotted with Champagne glass in hand, and more celebrity mishaps in our morning gossip roundup.
The date is October 25, three months after their engagement.
We're not sure why this matters, as there's no chance Kate is going to get it back. Plus, Jessica Simpson is thin again and Kevin Federline is getting fatter in today's roundup of celebrity ephemera.
Meanwhile, Cameron Diaz has signed on to play Seth Rogen's love interest, and this thing with Kate Hudson and A-Rod is STILL happening, in today's gossip roundup.
This is one of the only times we can imagine we've shared the same emotion as the self-styled lifestyle guru.
It's a win-win situation! If only the neighbors could see it that way.
Apparently the actress and healthy-living guru had a hand in Miss Scarlett's recent makeover.
Act of charity or ostentatious laziness?
The singer made off with $50,000 in diamonds loaned to her for an event. Also in today's gossip: John Mayer accidentally moved in next door to Denise Richards, and Dan Abrams and Renée Zellweger were spotted canoodling (ick).
Because there's no other reason to go to Lucky Cheng's for dinner.
What can it mean?!?! Probably only that it didn't match her other jewelry. Also, what is Britney really saying in that new song? In the gossip roundup.
The couple had trouble getting into one of the inaugural balls last night. Also, Sheryl Crow had an awkward interaction with an ex, and Russell Simmons got caught stealing!
Does it sound like that should have an exclamation point after it? Well, we're not using any of those things today. Today's gossip roundup shall stand on its own merits.
Plus, we prayed to the Christmas angel it'll be a good, healthy year for Britney in 2009. In the merry little gossip roundup.
But wait, what does Jennifer Lopez have to do with all of this?
He said he wouldn't, but then he went ahead and did it, the crumbum. Also, Courtney Love's friends think she needs a doorman. In the gossip roundup.
It's about time, Halle, you're 42! Plus, it's about the only non-dull news in today's gossip roundup.