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Kids Today

  1. Spot What’s Wrong: Donald Trump Jr. Tweet Compares Syrian Refugees to SkittlesHint: It’s mathematically incorrect, grammatically incorrect, and offensive on multiple levels.
  2. Tell Your Kid Even Einstein Struggled in ScienceStudents are less motivated (and probably more bored) when they only learn lists of famous scientists’ achievements.
  3. Teen Breaks Into CIA Director’s EmailThe “cracka” claims to be a weed-loving teen.
  4. kids today
    Teenagers Are Happier Than Their Parents ThinkParents, as it turns out, are not so great at estimating the happiness of their children.
  5. kids today
    Millennials’ Parents Can’t Stop Meddling. How Big a Problem Is That?They’re even showing up in the workplace. 
  6. parenthood
    The Case for Taking Parental Leave When Your Kids Are TeenagersResearch suggests adolescence is when parental involvement can really make a difference.
  7. Cool Dad Bill de Blasio Lets NYC Kids Bring Cell Phones to School They’ve been banned for years.
  8. Kids From Africa Beaten and Called ‘Ebola’ in the BronxToday in “teens are the worst.”
  9. Memo to the White House: Here’s How You Use Emoji :smile:
  10. White House Knows Kids Hate Words, Plans Emoji-Based Campaign Discussing “capped [graduation hat] loan payments” is all the rage with millennials.
  11. kids today
    Italian Millennials: They’re Just Like Us!Five things you have in common with twentysomethings across the Atlantic (and one you don’t).
  12. Things Italian Parents Do That Make Brooklyn Parents Cringe (and Vice Versa)Whither thou car seat?
  13. The NYC Instagrams That Got a Teenager ArrestedThe photos are awesome.
  14. Teen Who Climbed World Trade Center Caught on Another Far Less Impressive Tower A water tower in Weehawken.
  15. Teens Literally Caught Red-Handed While Vandalizing Civil War Memorial The Simpsons did it.
  16. Ambitious Toddler Causes Brief Lockdown on White House LawnThe Secret Service declined to question him. 
  17. Dante and Chiara de Blasio Landed City Hall InternshipsNo summer slacking allowed for the mayor’s kids.
  18. the most important people in the world
    Malia Obama Went to Lollapalooza, So You Are Now Officially OldImagine how the president feels.
  19. Staten Island Teens Go Crazy for (Allegedly) Corrupt CongressmanRepresentative Michael Grimm stopped by a sweet-16 party.
  20. Brooklyn’s Biggest Tween Metal Band Scores $1.8 Million Record DealUnlocking the Truth will be making albums for Sony. 
  21. horrible things
    Police Want to Photograph Sexting Teen’s PenisUsing a shot to make him erect.
  22. New Kindergarten Test for 4-Year-Olds: Not Easy!It’s also administered on an iPad, of course.
  23. kids today
    Dress Your Baby in Young VersaceThese infants are looking fresh to death.
  24. New Jersey Prosecutor Delights in Teen’s Lack of Hacking Skills The 16-year-old was caught using a teacher’s password to change grades and attendance records.
  25. Teen Girls Went on a Monday Morning Mugging SpreeOne hour, four victims. 
  26. South Carolina Governor Nikki Haley: ‘We Will No Longer Educate Children … ’When 140 characters are just not enough.
  27. Ohio Mom Says Daughter Stabbed Her Because of Slender Man MemeHere comes the nationwide panic.
  28. Kids Injured After Firecracker Explodes on School BusSave it for the outdoors.
  29. Driver Causes Crash by Holding His Breath in a TunnelProving the dumb superstition brings very bad luck.
  30. NYC School ‘Fitnessgrams’ Are Telling Kids They’re FatParents are not pleased.
  31. Substitute Teacher Fired for Asking Kids for Relationship Advice She kept it G-rated.
  32. Worst Subway Car Ever: Kids Playing RecordersFor 40 minutes.
  33. Bad Kids Put Rat Poison in Teacher’s Water BottleShe didn’t become seriously ill.
  34. Nice Roommates Return $40,000 Found in Old CouchThe money belonged to a 91-year-old woman who doesn’t trust banks.
  35. Rush Limbaugh Is Now an Award-Winning Children’s Book AuthorPerhaps the right wing isn’t losing the youth after all.
  36. Queens Frat Channels Zac Efron in NeighborsThere goes the neighborhood.
  37. Teen Stowaway Has Left HawaiiIt’s not clear if he’ll be returned to his father in California.
  38. New Jersey Frat Bros Tag Dead Whale With Greek LettersYeah, man.
  39. kids today
    Senior Prank Goes Very, Very Wrong for New Jersey High SchoolersThe “but it’s a rite of passage excuse” didn’t go over well with cops.
  40. Meet Kalan Sherrard, NYC’s Most Avant-Garde Nihilist Subway PerformerI think it has to do with being really bored with the world,” he says.
  41. Kwasi Enin, Ivy League Kid, Going to YaleThe Long Island overachiever announced his pick at a press conference.
  42. Rick MacArthur Quits Columbia Spectator BoardThe student paper is going “web-first” and journalism’s resident dinosaur does not approve — at all.
  43. Columbia Student Paper Hears This Internet Journalism Stuff Is Going to Be BigThey’re cutting down the print edition to once a week.
  44. Teen Stowaway’s Father Says He Was Homesick for AfricaHe was always talking about going back to Africa.”
  45. Kids Busted for Early Monday Morning Muggings in Central ParkFour teenagers and a 12-year-old are suspected.
  46. 16-Year-Old Stowaway Flies From California to Hawaii in Jet’s Wheel WellAnd was unharmed.
  47. Miss America Says She Doesn’t Want Teen Punished for Asking Her to PromBut Nina Davuluri still won’t be doing any slow-dancing.
  48. Brave Teen Asks Miss America to Prom, Ends Up SuspendedNo fun.
  49. Portland Teen Who Peed in Drinking-Water Reservoir Has a PointI mean, really, dude?”
  50. Long Island Teens Thought Confederate Flag, Blackface Were Somehow AcceptableFour students at a Catholic high school have been expelled.
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