So January was cold, and February was short, but now it's finally March. And you know what that means? It's party time! No, not for you. For people who matter. We know since SocialiteRank.com shut down nearly a year ago, you haven't been as able to keep track of what's been going on with Tinsley and Zani and Margherita, but, trust us, they're still out every night, flawlessly executing that arm move that Ellen Page has been trying to imitate! See, March is when the events for young socialites really begin in earnest. Last night saw the Riverkeeper benefit at the Hearst Tower, hosted by the ecocharity's junior council. Scheduled next week is the American Museum of Natural History's Winter Dance and the Frick's Young Fellows' Ball. A quick peek down the list of all the host committees show that, this year, all the fun is dominated by one set of friends. Claire Bernard, Maggie Betts, and Jamie Johnson are on the committees of all three of the above events, and they are joined here and there by Amanda Hearst, Hudson Morgan, Annie Churchill, Andrew Black, Derek Blasberg, and Byrdie Bell. This is a little bit of a shift away from the Tinsley-Dabney-Lydia axis, but it's essentially the same gang. Which isn't surprising, only…where's Olivia Palermo?
SKIN • Model-socialite Lydia Hearst signs as the new face for Escada fragrances. [Fashionista]
• Thyme’s Red Cherie Collection offers pomegranate with ripe red cherries, passion flower, and jasmine bubble baths. [Face Candy]
Veronica Hearst is using her Fifth Avenue apartment and a property in upstate New York as collateral in case the auction for her 52-room mansion in Palm Beach doesn't hit $40 million. Meanwhile, her step-granddaughter Lydia Hearst just bought a $1.49 million apartment in the Sheffield 57 on West 57th. Damon Dash got freaked out by the lunar eclipse. CNBC's Money Honey, Maria Bartiromo, has joined the board at her alma mater, NYU. Cindy Adams thinks Ellen Page is, uh, "a young, white, female Obama."
To be fair, it was really her French bulldog Shann's Legally Blonde that won the red ribbon. But Patricia was by her side the whole time, cheering her on and doing that thing where you pull the dog's legs back so it looks sexier when it stands. The pooch won Best of Opposite Sex, which is basically like second place, in the French bulldog breed. When most people think of Patricia Hearst, they think of her days with the Symbionese Liberation Army, back in the seventies, when she was kidnapped and then brainwashed into joining forces with her captors. But we can only think of her as the lady who brought us model Lydia Hearst! Lydia was strutting her stuff in front of crowds way before this Shann's Legally Blonde character was even a twinkle in some stud's eye. But now they're competing for headlines and Patricia's attention. We know where this is going Shann's Legally Blonde is probably calling Cisco Adler's publicist as we speak.
Patty Hearst's Bulldog Wins at Westminster [NYS]
It's a bad sign that the first thing we wondered while trying to make our way into the Rock & Republic show tonight was, "Is this the new Heatherette?" The answer is not quite, if only because the show didn't feature the campy deliciousness of assless pants.
• Britney Spears looks great on the new cover of Blender — too bad it's not her body. [Radar]
• Stephen Chao, the former News Corp. exec who lost his job after hiring a male stripper for a company party and almost drowning Rupert Murdoch's dog, announced a new Website for how-to videos. First video: how to get fired in two easy steps. [NYT]
• Now that Judith Regan's settled her suit with Murdoch, will she give her winnings — likely north of $6.5 million — to charity like she once promised? [Mixed Media/Portfolio]
We love, love, love Heatherette — even though their show is a glamorous debacle every year, and even though we're not always sure where to buy their clothes. Traver Raines and Richie Rich, the house's creative team, are nice, fun, energetic, and brilliant. Every season their train wreck of an exposition is the highlight during Fashion Week. That's why we are hit hard by the news that they won't be showing this February. They were supposed to show at Roseland Ballroom this year, too, which would have meant that everyone could have come, and the after-party would have been glorious. We're trying to find out why they've bailed (they "prefer not to comment," but we'll get it out of them — we run with the same gays, after all), but in the meantime, we've compiled a top ten list of reasons they might have called off the show:
1) They're only doing a "Cruise" collection this year.
2) They, like so many other small fashion houses, fell victim to great glitter shortage of 2008.
3) The only chaps they could find had asses.
4) Tinsley ate something.
5) Boy Meets Boy went back on the air.
6) A six-foot-eight drag queen has Richie and Traver locked up in a basement somewhere in the Village because she didn't get into their last fashion show, even though she WAS INVITED.
7) Lady Bunny ate Lydia Hearst. Totally kidding. She flossed with her.
8) Someone actually wanted to buy something from last season's show, and they had to figure out how to make it again.
9) Richie broke an axle. On his roller skate.
10) Their Amanda Lepore popped.
Heatherette Cancels Fashion Show [Fashionista]
Tina Brown signed a deal to develop story ideas and shows for HBO. Donny Deutsch celebrated his 50th-birthday party at the Jazz at Lincoln Center with lobster tail and foie gras. Harvey Weinstein and Georgina Chapman are having trouble yachting around on their Caribbean honeymoon because there's a massive fuel strike on St. Barts. (Weinstein's friends also sent him a lot of video congratulations on the day of his wedding.) Lydia Hearst is mad that her name is being attached to Darfur awareness events without her permission. Gay activist Allen Roskoff keeps George Bush toilet paper at his Jane Street apartment.
Name: Lydia Hearst.
Job: Lydia is not just an heiress! She's a model, a columnist for Page Six the Magazine, and designer for Puma, most recently of the "Lydia" bag. She takes these jobs very seriously but remains endearingly grateful to her great-grandfather, William Randolph Hearst, for making it so she doesn't have to have them if she doesn't want to.
Neighborhood: Columbus Circle
Who's your favorite New Yorker, living or dead, real or fictional?
William Randolph Hearst.
What's the best meal you've eaten in New York?
Truffle macaroni and cheese from Lure.
In one sentence, what do you actually do all day in your job?
To tell you everything that I do would take more than one sentence. I have three full-time jobs: high-fashion modeling, writing, and designing. I am a firm believer that there are 24 useful hours in every day.
You know how you start sleeping with someone, and then one day, all of a sudden, he completely grosses you out and you have to immediately break up with him, and maybe even pretend it never happened? We call this Sudden Revulsion Syndrome, and we think Lydia Hearst must have gotten a strong case of it regarding her BF Cisco Adler. It seems like mere weeks ago that Lydia and the large-balled Whitestarr front man were making out at the Box, and freaking each other in L.A. on Halloween, and Lydia was gushing that their relationship was "a whole other form of creation." But a socialite's love is fleeting. "Page Six" this morning reports that Lydia was overheard saying, "I'm so single!" this past weekend, and her rep tells the Post, "they were never really boyfriend-girlfriend." Ouch. We're not too worried about Cisco though. We feel he'll bounce back. In fact, after the jump, our suggestions of ladies he could start being spotted canoodling with.
Harvey Weinstein either physically removed a D.J. who was acting inappropriately with a lady at his table at Rose Bar or was punched in the face by him. (He's also getting married next month.) Denzel Washington had 30 bespoke suits made by an English tailor on East 53rd Street. Liz Smith speculates that the next Time person of the year will be the environment. Cindy Adams reports that a book on Heather Mills is in the works. The owner of Baraonda, the Italian eatery at 75th and Second, got a new lease on the space. PR guru Lara Shriftman has given into the pressure and revealed the daddy of her baby: rum heir Juan Bacardi.
Noted model-profiler Spencer Morgan turns his gimlet eye in this week's Observer to one Lydia Hearst. We find Lydia puzzling: She has of late been dating Cisco Adler, Mischa Barton's large-balled ex (er, NSFW), and writing a turgid column for Page Six the Magazine about her collective of friends, which she dubs "the 2.0," yet seems curiously unembarrassed about these things. In fact, it's almost as if she has no sense of self-awareness at all! "I always envision myself being a Hemingway type," she tells Morgan. Also, she has a 32-inch bust, 21-inch waist, and 34-inch hips, and is "definitely not a socialite," which we guess means she changed her mind from back in May, when she told New York she was proud of being a socialite. But a great mind is nothing if not fluid! What else is rolling around Lydia's brain?
A Long Island woman Michael Lohan met in family court is pissed off because he has another girlfriend. An item claims there's "trouble in paradise" between Amy Sacco and fiancé Luigi Di Carolis but doesn't specify what it is. Bill Clinton threw Chelsea's ex Ian Klaus a book party at Tabla. A number of people invited to the In Touch party at Tenjune never made it inside because the doormen let in their personal friends instead of invited guests. Denise Rich plans to take her 6,000-foot yacht, now docked at the Battery Park Marina, to the Caribbean for Thanksgiving. Gillian Hearst-Shaw and Christian Simonds are getting married tomorrow at the Pierre Hotel, with Lydia set to be her sister's maid of honor.
A-Rod and ur-agent Scott Boras dined at Nello's. Eva Mendes hopped in the wrong limo. New York's First Lady Silda Wall Spitzer told attendees of a More-magazine convention that the best advice she ever got was "either piss or get off the pot." Cisco Adler and Lydia Hearst were cozy at Bungalow 8. Jann Wenner was widely mocked at the 30th reunion party of the Rolling Stone staff from 1977 (everyone gave him the finger in the group photo, and no one drank the Champagne he sent). Joaquin Phoenix hung up on a reporter from Time Out after she asked him what he did to prepare for his roles. Single-again Nick Cannon hung out with a bunch of beauty-pageant queens at Tenjune.
The big questions on our lips before Jennifer Lopez's JustSweet show: Would any big names make it across town after Zac Posen? Would Posh Spice come out to support the good friend of her pal Tom Cruise? And, most important, would Marc Anthony look as undead in person?