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Barbara Walters Wants to Be Your Friend!

Barbara Walters
Barbara Walters included MySpace founders Tom Anderson and Chris DeWolfe on her Most Fascinating People of 2007 list, but she isn't having so much luck with the site herself. Her View co-producer Bill Geddie checked out her profile today during her Sirius radio show and was aghast at what he saw. "You only have the two [MySpace] guys as friends. Chris and Tom!" he announced.

Lance Bass Resorts to Name-Calling on His Blog

In the latest issue of New York Mag, former 'N Syncer Lance Bass talks to Jada Yuan about the unquestionable pain in the ass that is New York real estate. He noted that a lot of furnished rentals he looked at didn't have "any style," and that "crap" apartments go for a lot of money (sing it, sister). And as for his former bandmate Justin Timberlake's new dining establishment, Southern Hospitality, Lance says he's been there "a few times," though he's not on the Upper East Side much. And then, perhaps because his broker got indignant, or perhaps because JT made a phone call or two, Lance decided that he'd never said any of that stuff at all. On a defensive little tirade on his MySpace blog, Lance called Yuan a "dumb reporter" who got it all wrong. Oh no he didn't! But he did, and he did it again in an e-mail sent directly to the gang over at Vulture. Head over there to see Lance's official "you are so wrong" (even though we're not — we stand behind Yuan's reporting) statement. Lance Bass Learns About Damage Control [Vulture] Lance Bass Not Hooked on NYC [NYM]

Rupert Murdoch Peels an Onion

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Lost in all the Wall Street Journal drama is the news of Rupert Murdoch getting his paws on another bastion of American journalism: The Onion. The beloved if slightly over-the-hill humor newspaper has signed on to provide exclusive content to MySpace, including audio podcasts and video from its misbegotten Onion News Network offshoot. The paper announced the partnership via press release filled with the usual barrage of jokes — and with a buzz-kill addendum ("the foregoing is a satirical press release published by MySpace, Inc…") that suggests the big-league nature of the deal. Despite its shaggy pose, the Onion boasts dead-serious print circulation (3 million copies) and online traffic (4 million visitors each month). One can't help but feel troubled, though. The newspaper industry's panicked attempts to branch out into every new platform from social networks to mobile phones should be prime satire fodder; the Onion, in doing the same thing with the same zeal (anyone remember "The Onion on Your PDA" ads?), is losing just a bit of its outsider soul every time it oh-so-self-effacingly bites a new fad. The Onion Brings Its Irreverent Satire to MySpace [News.com] Earlier: New ‘Onion’ Fake News: Actually Fake, Not So Funny

Adios, Lonelygirl15

It seems like only eleven months ago that we found out lonely girl Bree Avery wasn't really a home-schooled video-blogging 16-year-old, but rather the invention of a filmmaking duo from California — and now she's dead.

If You Have 1.7 Million Friends, Do You Really Need to Eat?

Tila Nguyen
Tila "Tequila" Nguyen is the queen of MySpace (or the "Madonna of MySpace," if you read Time), with about 1.7 million virtual friends. She flies back and forth from Los Angeles to New York for photo shoots (here) and celebrity appearances (there). And when she's in town, Tila likes to sample the room service at the W Hotel and the vegan faux-meat goodness at Red Bamboo. Sound pricey? Don't fret. Tila's allergic to alcohol. "I'm still a cheap date," she assures Grub Street. ‘MySpace Queen’ Tila Tequila Drinks Sprite with her Fugu, Likes her Omelets with Ketchup [Grub Street]

Atoosa Watch: Still Unstable, Updating Blog Frequently

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We know, we know: We care way too much about the latest updates to former Seventeen editor Atoosa Rubinstein's MySpace blog. (You know, that launching pad for her TK-soon domination of the Internet.) But the thing is, there's just such good stuff there each time we check. Last week, there was the announcement of Atoosa.com. And then when we looked this morning, there was this:
I lived my whole life just trying to be the perfect girl my mother wanted me to be: I never let on when I was struggling. I realize now that's why I became a cutter — I'd gone through a very serious trauma but kept it completely to myself instead of imposing it on my parents — so instead I used the razor to do my crying for me.
Two reactions. First: Wow, Atoosa was a cutter. Second: Are weeping rainbows supposed to make us think she's cured? The Dangers of Protecting Your Parents TOO Much [Atoosa's MySpace]

On the Internet, They Still Know You're Atoosa (Not That the Journey Music Is Helping)

Former Seventeen EIC Atoosa Rubinstein, who has famously brought solace to teen girls everywhere by never exiting her own awkward stage, officially pulled up stakes in the corporeal world today and incorporated Big Momma LLC, the first media empire to launch on a MySpace page. But what does a queen-teen mogul taking the Internet by storm look like, anyway? We headed over to her MySpace to witness the blazing possibilities, and we discovered, first, "Don't Stop Believin'" and, second, that she'd posted the results of one of those auto-generated online personality polls:

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Ouch! Pretty much junior high all over again, right? But don't worry, 'Toos. Your mom called the principal, and the Internet is totally getting a week of detention. 'Toos Moves [WWD] Atoosa [MySpace]

Foodies Flock to Networking Site; No Word If Any Have Dates

Food Candy is as simple as a baked potato: It's the Foodie Friendster (or, as you cutting-edge types would probably prefer, MySpace). The strange thing about the site is how happy, normal, and attractive the people look. Can these really be the same hard-core geeks that we've eaten with? Or is this the food version of JDate, which for the longest time showed you pictures of one Sarah Silverman after another, only to deliver Golda Meirs? We appreciate how the site brings together established bloggers like Daisy Martinez with obscure but worthy writers we didn't know about, like the farm-loving Pease Porridge and the admirably focused Burrito Blog. (Restaurant Girl and Famous Fat Dave had already made fans of us.) We just hope this social phenomenon reflects the foodie community's increasing obsessiveness, not some attempt at reintegrating with normal human society.