We made up some things.
Korea's twentysomething leader delivered his first-ever public address.
This is our only explanation.
The rocket broke into pieces off the western coast of the Korean Peninsula.
For peaceful purposes, it says.
The president used a pair of binoculars to peer into the de-militarized zone.
We have the "exclusive" (fake) story.
He always got all the cool dictatorships from his dad.
The Associated Press is opening a full-time office in the totalitarian state.
Yeah, that's what we figured.
"He resembles Blueberry Girl from 'Willy Wonka.'"
The training wheels are off.
Daily Intel digs for the truth! And it finds ... something!
Nobody has ever cried as hard over anything as North Koreans cried over Kim Jong-Il today.
A farewell ceremony will be held on Thursday.
The young heir will have help from his aunt, uncle, and the military.
Intense crying, test missiles, and sorting out succession.