Sarah Jessica Parker is not confident that her unreleased movie, Spinning Into Butter, will ever see the light of day. Barack Obama and his wife are slated to attend the opening of Cat on a Hot Tin Roof with Oprah on Thursday. Cosmetics heir Olivia Chantecaille got engaged to banker boyfriend Ren Grady. Gossip Girl's Blake Lively took a bunch of friends shopping to Armani Exchange on Fifth Avenue. Shake Shack is opening a location on the Upper West Side! Sting, Diddy, and Josh Hartnett all hung out at Half Nelson producer Charlie Corwin's birthday at Socialista, which is now back open after the hepatitis scare. Michael Musto will appear on the cover of The Village Voice spoofing this magazine's Lindsay Lohan shoot.
In the past week or so ESPN.com's Bill Simmons — "The Sports Guy," a massively popular columnist who's ostensibly a sportswriter but would better be described as the National Commissioner of Bar Arguments — has started writing about "Mount Rapmore," a hypothetical rap version of Mount... well, yes.
Last night's (Auction)RED at Sotheby's was a complete success, succeeding in raising more than $42 million to fight HIV/AIDS in Africa. It also saw a heavy celebrity turnout: Michael Stipe, Russell Simmons, Christy Turlington, Martha Stewart, Ed Burns, and Dennis Hopper all showed up to support hosts Damien Hirst and Bono. But oddly enough, the money and the star power didn't seem to be connected. Michael Stipe, for example, told us earlier in the week that he had his eye on an Ed Ruscha. But he told us last night he "didn't get a paddle." Even though it was Valentine's Day and he was there with his boyfriend! "We're not going to buy each other $5 million paintings, I'll tell you that!" Stipe said, limping away on his crutch, the result of a go-karting accident. Brian Williams also told us he "can't afford a single thing they're auctioning tonight." But he added, "if there's a collection bowl, I'm good for probably twenty bucks." Even Queen Noor of Jordan said she "couldn't even remotely dream about" buying one of the pricey Hirst pill cabinets on the block. So who's buying all this expensive art, if even movie stars and royalty can't afford it? (RED) campaign co-founder Bobby Shriver cleared that up. "Sotheby's and Gagosian are willing to stage this, with their lists, to their buyers," he explained. "Here, you have a commercial company promoting to their commercial buyers, which is a tremendous asset of theirs, selling products that they could have sold at their normal markup. That's a new platform for raising pro-social money." —Bennett MarcusSee and hear more from Bono, Queen Noor, Christy Turlington and others from last night's (RED) auction.
Because it took us 45 minutes to get to Lincoln Center in rush-hour traffic, we might have been a little late for Tommy Hilfiger. And because we might have been a little late for Tommy Hilfiger, we might have missed the chance to sit in our actual assigned seats. This may be how we ended up loitering in a glass-enclosed balcony, fighting for a spot past the folks in standing room who'd gotten there at a reasonable hour. And that's how we found ourselves at our lowest Fashion Week point, both emotionally and physically: kneeling on the carpet, peering through people's legs down at the front row below.
Usually by this point in Fashion Week, we're so tired that we start hallucinating celebrities everywhere we look. While this would be divine if we were having visions of Matt Damon, instead there was a split second in which we were convinced we saw Kenneth Branagh wandering around aimlessly in a full-length man mink (strike one), and we thought this one short dude at Carolina Herrera was Lucy Liu (strike two, and we're sorry about that gender mix-up, Lucy).
It's a bad sign that the first thing we wondered while trying to make our way into the Rock & Republic show tonight was, "Is this the new Heatherette?" The answer is not quite, if only because the show didn't feature the campy deliciousness of assless pants.
Heath Ledger has been stalking Gemma Ward around town and also tried hitting on (taken) Heather Graham. The server who brought Chelsea Clinton the wrong appetizer at Irving Mill may or may not have been fired. Calvin Klein is vandalizing his Houston Street billboard for the opening of the New Museum on the Bowery. NBC honcho Jeff Zucker doesn't want the strike to end because retail advertisers have already bought up ad space, and now production costs are zero. Kimora Lee Simmons was overheard saying that the reason she invited Russell Simmons's new girlfriend, Porschla Coleman, to meet the "major players" at Simmons's birthday last month is because she "wants this stupid bitch to get a clue." Seagram heir Edgar Bronfman Jr. just bought an $18.75 million condo in the Carhart mansion on East 95th Street.
Lenny Kravitz complained that his 18-year-old daughter's skirt was too short. Nancy Reagan wants Mayor Bloomberg to run for president. New York Ranger Sean Avery may be cheating on Mary-Kate Olsen with ex-flame Lake Bell. Heath Ledger and Kate Hudson may or may not have made out at the Beatrice Inn. A lady clamoring to see Jessica Simpson at the Waverly Inn knocked over a table and tumbled into the fireplace. Leroy Barnes, a drug-dealing competitor of Frank Lucas (Denzel Washington), says American Gangster, portrayed him inaccurately. An ex-cop made a board game that highlights the incompetence surrounding the rebuilding of ground zero.
Richard Gere may buy the penthouse in Julian Schnabel's West Village building, if he can sell his Sullivan Street townhouse for $12 million first. Henry Kissinger, Michael Eisner, and Barry Diller were among the power players who ate at Michael's for lunch yesterday. Some designers are refusing to use the Earth Pledge's ecofriendly "Sea Leather" because it's actually made out of dead fish skin. Ivana Trump's new engagement ring, from daughter Ivanka's jewelry line, costs $250,000. Anderson Cooper told Conan that he has a "fatty deposit" under his eye that is visible in high definition. NBC refused to run a Larry Craig–inspired political commercial, though CNN picked it up. (Perhaps it had something to do with Matt Lauer's interview with the disgraced senator?)