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School Daze

  1. side hustles
    What Can You Learn at Tilda Swinton’s School? Applied lessons in becoming a rich eccentric. 
  2. NYC Parents Upset at School for Daring to Assign Kids FunP.S. 116 in Kips Bay has stopped assigning homework, instead telling kids to enjoy themselves.
  3. Staten Island Woman Might Have Threatened to Blow Up Her Daughter’s School Because the girl failed a test. 
  4. school daze
    Washington Heights School’s Bathrooms Are BadThat might not even be the worst part of this story.
  5. Columbia Allowing Law Students to Delay Exams[These] cases have shaken the faith of some in the integrity of the grand jury system and in the law more generally.”
  6. University of Virginia Suspends All Frats After Disturbing Sexual Assault StoryA Rolling Stone article published earlier this week detailed a student’s brutal gang-rape at the Phi Kappa Psi house.
  7. ‘Tasteful’ Guns in Senior Portraits Are OkaySure.
  8. 149 Students Hospitalized Due to Mysterious OdorYonkers Middle High School was evacuated on Wednesday due to a “gas-like smell.”
  9. Columbia Cancels Concert, Solves Campus AssaultWe feel strongly that this is a band-aid, not a solution, in the fight against sexual assault on Columbia’s campus.”
  10. New Kindergarten Test for 4-Year-Olds: Not Easy!It’s also administered on an iPad, of course.
  11. Scientology Sneaking Its Anti-Drug Programs Into NYC SchoolsAnd peddling unscientific scare tactics.
  12. New Jersey Prosecutor Delights in Teen’s Lack of Hacking Skills The 16-year-old was caught using a teacher’s password to change grades and attendance records.
  13. New Jersey Substitute Teacher Fired for Enforcing ‘Quiet Game’ Rules With TapeWe were jabbering too much,” admitted one student.
  14. NYU Now Fighting With Neighbors UptownJust for a change of scenery.
  15. Kids Injured After Firecracker Explodes on School BusSave it for the outdoors.
  16. Substitute Teacher Fired for Asking Kids for Relationship Advice She kept it G-rated.
  17. Bad Kids Put Rat Poison in Teacher’s Water BottleShe didn’t become seriously ill.
  18. NYU Abu Dhabi Workers Treated Terribly; NYU ShrugsDespite the school’s idealistic promises of fair labor practices, the reality was quite the opposite.
  19. Queens Frat Channels Zac Efron in NeighborsThere goes the neighborhood.
  20. Kwasi Enin, Ivy League Kid, Going to YaleThe Long Island overachiever announced his pick at a press conference.
  21. Miss America Says She Doesn’t Want Teen Punished for Asking Her to PromBut Nina Davuluri still won’t be doing any slow-dancing.
  22. Kansas Parents Worried That Michelle Obama Will Upstage Their High Schoolers They want to disinvite the First Lady from a graduation ceremony.
  23. Brave Teen Asks Miss America to Prom, Ends Up SuspendedNo fun.
  24. Long Island Teens Thought Confederate Flag, Blackface Were Somehow AcceptableFour students at a Catholic high school have been expelled.
  25. Sexton Made Faculty Housing Into Duplex for SonRight as the school announced a housing shortage.
  26. The Backlash Against New York’s Standardized Tests Is Getting SeriousParents, teachers, and principals protested across the city today.
  27. school daze
    Staten Island Tweens Hospitalized After Getting Caught Drinking at SchoolThe old vodka-in-an-iced-tea-bottle trick.
  28. UConn and Kentucky Both Rioted a Bit Last NightWin or lose, the result was the same.
  29. Read the College Essay That Got Kwasi Enin Into All 8 Ivy League SchoolsIt is very much a college essay.
  30. Long Island Teen Just Happened to Get Into All 8 Ivy League SchoolsAnd Duke.
  31. New York’s Schools Are the Country’s Most Racially Segregated New York City’s charter schools are some of the least diverse of all.
  32. Brooklyn High-Schoolers Forced to Spend the Night on Broken Bus in FloridaWith no way to charge their phones.
  33. Queens Teaching Assistant Accused of Sexually Assaulting 14-Year-Old StudentShe’ll be arraigned on Thursday evening.
  34. Horace Mann Tiger Woods, Canh Oxelson, ArrestedLots going on here, and it’s all wild.
  35. 4-Year-Old Wanders Out of School; No One NoticesAfter Avonte Oquendo, this does not look good.
  36. Private-School Parents Spy on Prospective Students’ Families Of course.
  37. Bill Clinton Is the Face of a Massive For-profit College CompanyThey must be paying him a lot for this.
  38. Chemistry Experiment Fireball Injures Upper West Side High School Students Every teacher’s nightmare.
  39. Dante de Blasio Faces First Challenge As Mayor’s SonConvincing his father to declare a snow day.
  40. Harvard Students React to Bomb HoaxHe did have a stressful semester.”
  41. Harvard Student Charged With Bomb Hoax to Evade FinalsAnd he would have gotten away with it too, if it wasn’t for those meddling technicians!
  42. Harvard Students Cheer Canceled Exams Amid Bomb ThreatFour buildings were evacuated on Monday morning.
  43. NYU Kid ‘Can’t Remember’ How He Got Stuck Between Two BuildingsAccording to his mom.
  44. Horace Mann Investigating ‘Hypercompetitive’ College-Admissions SabotageSomeone sent a letter to schools hoping to screw up a senior’s chances.
  45. Giant 25-Year-Old Criminal Definitely Not a High-School FreshmanHe tried to pass as one in New Jersey.
  46. Long Island Middle School Has the World’s Least Fun RecessEverything is banned. 
  47. Harvard Would Like Another $3.7 Billion, PleaseSo they can reach their $6.5 billion fund-raising goal.
  48. Whole Cornell Lacrosse Team Suspended for HazingApparently there was “coerced consumption of alcohol.”
  49. Nazi Postings at Oberlin Were Just a Terrible ‘Joke’Not funny.
  50. Conservatives Are Very Upset That Kids These Days Can’t Write in CursiveHow will they understand the Declaration of Independence?
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