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"We most certainly should not speak to the press."
The ad has since been pulled.
That being a conversion to Scientology, apparently.
If things don't work out with Rosie O'Donnell ...
The TomKat divorce has brought negative scrutiny to the formerly rock solid organization.
"I shouldn't be involved in religion or however you want to phrase it."
Thank God for Twitter.
"I met Paul twice. He was never nice to me."
Tom Cruise has officially morphed into your embarrassing uncle.
Another bizarre propaganda video from the Church of Scientology!
We hazard a guess as to one of the queries.
Including the most terrifying game of musical chairs ever.
"I am not going to order you to drink juice but you should consider drinking juice."
It's time for a new metaphor.
Which of the three do you think could most believably have sprung from Philip Seymour Hoffman's loins?
Cruise's lawyer is already denying allegations made in an upcoming book from a former Scientology insider.
Why does this thing need to cost $35 million, anyway?