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Shawn Sachs

  1. office-party patrol
    John Mayer Was the Second-Tallest Man at the Sunshine Sachs Holiday Party What’s that sucking sound? Oh, right — that’s the Ghost of Christmas Present siphoning all feeling but holiday cheer out of the city. It’s December, people, and you know what that means. Company holiday parties! This is the week the season kicks into high gear, and so we’re reintroducing our Office-Party Patrol feature. Last year, we had dedicated partygoer Julia Allison crash company booze fests, but now she is too booby and famous, so we’re doing it ourselves. If we can’t get into a party, we’ll accost the drunkest person we see leaving it and find out everything you’re missing. In today’s premier installment, we take you to the ever-evolving Sunshine Sachs PR party and the ever-devolving CollegeHumor.com fête — and we rank each one for food, drink, venue, debauchery, and exclusivity. Who won? Don’t be silly people — at office holiday parties, nobody wins.