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The Greatest Depression

  1. Lenny Dykstra Is ‘Indigent,’ ‘Dazed’The former Met pleaded not guilty to bankruptcy charges today.
  2. The Rise of the Adult-Shaped ChildMore people in their 20s and 30s are moving back home.
  3. So Who Gets to Be Hotter in the Too Big to Fail HBO Adaptation Than They Are in Real Life?Answer: most people.
  4. Unemployment Holds at 9.6 Percent: Overall Jobs Lost, Private Employment Losing SteamThis is bad news.
  5. Bob Rubin Feels Loved AgainThe former Treasury secretary has found a young, firm … firm.
  6. Government Spent Billions to Update the Résumés of Thousands of PeopleThe federal government has allocated $4.3 billion for training programs that a freakishly small amount of people are enrolled in.
  7. Overconfidence, Entitlement in Twentysomethings Threatened by Great RecessionAmerica’s youth are struggling with the idea that they may not get to do whatever they want.
  8. Stock Market Suffers Crisis of ConfidenceWe’re afraid of everything, including our own fear.
  9. Ashton Kutcher Has Been Named ‘President of Pop Culture’ at PopchipsGet it? “Pop”?
  10. Most Americans Fail to Write Novel, Learn Italian in Spare TimeMost laid-off workers are just sleeping and watching TV.
  11. Florida Scofflaws: We Were Taken Advantage of by Elitist New York PaperForeclosed-upon Florida homeowners object to their characterization of themselves.
  12. Chamillionaire Is Latest Victim of Down Housing MarketRapper says his $2 chamillion house is now worthless.
  13. Latvians Stimulate Economy With ‘Blonde Parade’Riga: now leading the world in low-overhead, fail-safe stimulus programs.
  14. Homeowners Who Refuse to Pay Mortgages May Be First Genuine Heroes of the RecessionSome homeowners are opting to put their money into the economy instead of giving it back to the banks.
  15. Yesterday’s Wall Street Protest: A Good Time Was Had by AllCostumes, floats, and shiny sunglasses. Yesterday’s demonstrations were fun!
  16. New York City Is Wall Street’s Trophy WifeAnd we have an unfavorable prenup.
  17. The Dow Closed At 11005.97 Today!Who’s afraid to say the recession’s over, now?
  18. Finally, a Broadway-Style Song About Credit Default SwapsIt’s awesome.
  19. Adorable Truckers Knit Sweaters in DowntimeAmazingly, this is not a new Tumblr blog.
  20. Social Security Pay Out To Exceed Pay-In, Six Years Ahead of ScheduleThreshold seen as a “tipping point” by analysts.
  21. Twentysomething New Yorkers Are Living With Their Parents to Save MoneyBut is this really a mark of the recession?
  22. fallen idols
    Alan Greenspan on ‘Too Big to Fail’ Financial Institutions: My BadBut it wasn’t like he didn’t know what was going on, okay?
  23. Geithner: ‘People Should Be Angry’ About BonusesMaddow drills down on the “bonus thing.”
  24. Dodd Introduces Bill to Jump-start Financial Reform, Sets Aggressive TimelineThe Fed might be getting bigger.
  25. Recession Inspires Art, HoardingRecession-bound dad makes castle out of free Jell-O.
  26. Recession Radically Transforms East HamptonLuxury retailers close up shop, residents forced to wear plaid.
  27. The House Passed the Jobs BillThe vote was 217–201.
  28. We Benefited More From the Bailout Than AnyoneYay, us!
  29. ‘Entry-Level’ Mansions Are Sitting Empty All Over ConnecticutNo one can get loans to live in them.
  30. Wall Street Seems to Be RecessionproofYay?
  31. Former Wall Street Professional Attempts To Break Into Competitive New York MarketCupcakes.
  32. Rich Decide Enough Is Enough With This Flying-Commercial BusinessWould rather suffer populist rage than have to travel with the populace.
  33. Another Point About the Naming of This RecessionAn alternate suggestion.
  34. Wall Street Bonuses Up 17 PercentThe big guys might have cut back this year, but overall, bonuses were up.
  35. Daily Intel’s ‘Greatest Depression’ Unfairly Routed by Dull ‘Great Recession’Boring “Great Recession” added to AP Stylebook.
  36. Residents of Greenwich, Connecticut, Learn How to Settle for LessThe residents of the tony suburb to the north are forgoing Rolls Royces for more modest vehicles.
  37. The Deficit Is Getting Bigger$1.6 trillion here we come.
  38. Sometimes We Appreciate a Little Honesty in Job AnnouncementsThe Patriot in Tribeca is clear about what it wants in a bartender.
  39. New York Unemployment Rate Worse Than It Has Been in a Long TimeNot even Melba Toast factories are safe.
  40. Unemployed? It Might Be Because You Are a Dumb Slob With No MannersHope that doesn’t make you nervous, because that’s bad, too.
  41. There Are Lots of Reasons People Give for Why They Are Bringing Back Bar CartsBut we know the real one.
  42. It Just Doesn’t Feel Like Christmas in New York This YearSomething is amiss.
  43. grim things
    Joblessness Spreads in New YorkIt’s even hard to get a gig cleaning toilets.
  44. the greatest depression
    Congress Mulls Reinstating Glass-SteagallIt “is certainly under discussion,” says Steny Hoyer.
  45. the greatest depression
    Larry Summers Says the Recession is OverApparently “everyone agrees.”
  46. the greatest depression
    Frank Rich Really Liked Up in the AirThe George Clooney Oscar vehicle is gonna heal America!
  47. Obama Lays Out Strategy to Prevent a Jobs ‘Katrina’A subtle nod to Arianna Huffington?
  48. the greatest depression
    Bankers Now Taking Jobs Away From Old People, High-School StudentsFirst they blew up the economy. Now they’re stealing what few jobs are left.
  49. the greatest depression
    TARP Will Cost $200 Billion Less Than ExpectedObama wants to use the money to create jobs.
  50. Obama’s Job Strategy Will Be Disappointingly UnfunNo drugs, whores, or gambling? What’s the point?
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