Or you could say JPMorgan will FIRE half of Bear Stearns staff. It's all how you look at it, really. Plus! The GM building may have a new owner, 'People' people get a hairy new deadline, and a lawyer's advice for tax dodgers in our daily roundup of industry news.
When we caught up with Tina Brown at last night's Atlantic dinner and State of the Union–viewing session, we were curious as to what she thinks about Hillary Clinton lately. The senator, after all, is going to be one of the subjects of Brown's just-announced book, The Clinton Chronicles. "I think [her campaign so far] is a complete high-wire, absolutely astonishing, ever-changing drama," Brown explained. "I think a lot of it, too, is a construct as well. Whenever I see so-called Bill Clinton eruptions, they’re not eruptions at all." Man, she's already dissecting them like fetal pigs! Awesome. "I think that he will definitely recalibrate," Brown added. "I think you will probably see less of him in the next two weeks." Elsewhere at the party, Law & Order: SVU heroine Mariska Hargitay lounged with her husband, Peter Hermann, one of the male stars of Cashmere Mafia. So, Peter, what does Mariska think of your steamy Cashmere sex scenes? "We go do other things when it’s on, and then I rewind the DVR and watch them in private," Hermann explained carefully. "Then we talk it through and let it all subside a little bit and then we move on." He laughed then and showed his megawatt smile (Mariska has one, too, but she's not allowed to show it on TV). "We’re working through it." Good for them, but too bad for us. How great would it be if Mariska kicked down a studio door and shoved a 9mm in Miranda Otto's face? We love it when she does that. —Jada YuanGet more dirt from Andy Borowitz, Bronson van Wyck, and Rick Lazio at our complete coverage of the Atlantic's State of the Union Dinner. Earlier: Tina Brown to Publish a New ‘Chronicles’
It was a mere two days ago that we were callously ringing the death knell of Tina Brown. And, lo, today we hear that she is not, in fact, dead: She's just working on another book that everybody has already written! To follow up her hugely successful Diana Chronicles, Brown will be writing a definitive tome on, get this, THE CLINTONS. We'd make a joke about how this topic is so overdone, but for all of the copies of Chronicles Brown sold, she was clearly the one laughing all the way to the bank. "Tina Brown will take on the Bill and Hillary Clinton era in The Clinton Chronicles to be edited by Phyllis Grann and published in 2010," reports Publishers Weekly. This raises two questions: First, is every book of hers from now on going to be called a Chronicles? And, second, the Clinton era will be over by 2010. Does Tina know something we don't?
Tina Brown to Write 'The Clinton Chronicles' for Doubleday [PW]
Related:Ask Not for Whom The Bell Tolls. It Tolls for Tina Brown.
Late last week, we received a very nice invitation to a luncheon sponsored by the Magazine Publisher's Association and the American Society of Magazine Editors. It was their annual lifetime achievement awards, and guess who is being honored? Tina Brown. Apparently the former editor of Tatler, The New Yorker, Vanity Fair, and the ill-fated Talk is at that point in her career when the final retrospective is in order. You know, the point in her career that comes at the end. We feel a little bad for Tina. Getting a lifetime achievement award when you are 54 is a little bit like getting the "Most Improved GPA" certificate at college graduation or a magazine cover with the tagline "Sexy at ANY Age": It's an honor and an insult at once. Surely, we thought, Tina must be up to something. She's a legend! For example, there's that HBO development deal that we heard about but HBO exec Sheila Nevins apparently didn't. And after finishing her book The Diana Chronicles in late 2006, she went on to write Um Well, we're not sure, exactly. An insider tells us that she's shopping around two or three new projects. But we haven't heard about them. Does anybody know what Tina's been up to? Or should we start assembling a clip reel for her memorial service award-ceremony montage right now? We'll set it to the tune of "Candle in the Wind."
Related:HBO's Sheila Nevins Is Confused by Tina Brown, Bored by Hillary
Mary Jo Buttafuoco, who is working a memoir about being shot by Amy Fisher, thinks the Long Island Lolita is trashy for cashing in on the fame she got from almost killing her. Patricia Clarkson and Gone Baby Gone actress Amy Ryan have seen each other "butt-ass naked." Larry Birkhead's former attorney claims that he still owes her over $1 million in legal fees. Candace Bushnell's former manager's Sex and the City tell-all includes the news that Darren Star passed on casting Ashton Kutcher because, he said, "I don't see this kid going anywhere."
So, what exactly is Tina Brown doing at HBO? We asked Sheila Nevins, head of HBO's documentary division, when we saw her at last night's Gucci Tribeca Documentary Fund Launch Dinner. "I don't know!" she said. "You tell me! I thought I'd read it in New York Magazine!" Nope, it was Liz Smith. "Here's the hot skinny on the queen of buzz," Liz wrote yesterday. "The amazing Tina Brown is in a newly struck, first-look deal to bring projects and story ideas to HBO." We can see how you'd confuse us, though. Anyway! Would Nevins be open to discussing ideas with Tina? "I talk to anybody! I like to work with anybody," she said, although she rejected the idea of a Princess Di documentary inspired by Brown's book. "There are too many Diana documentaries," she said. Yeah, people said that about the book, too. How about something on one of the presidential candidates? Hillary? "Well they say Hillary's tough to get good access to," she said. "I think actually what's her name tried. [Alexandra] Pelosi tried. But I don't think she got in the door. Candidates are boring. I think real people are more interesting. I'm into sort of human things, beating the odds. Ordinary people that crawl out of manhole covers. I like to lift manhole covers. And womanhole covers." —Amy Odell
Tina Brown signed a deal to develop story ideas and shows for HBO. Donny Deutsch celebrated his 50th-birthday party at the Jazz at Lincoln Center with lobster tail and foie gras. Harvey Weinstein and Georgina Chapman are having trouble yachting around on their Caribbean honeymoon because there's a massive fuel strike on St. Barts. (Weinstein's friends also sent him a lot of video congratulations on the day of his wedding.) Lydia Hearst is mad that her name is being attached to Darfur awareness events without her permission. Gay activist Allen Roskoff keeps George Bush toilet paper at his Jane Street apartment.
We ran into Tina Brown while waiting for the elevator at the last night's Heart On! benefit at Lincoln Center and thought we'd make polite conversation. How about Dan Rather suing CBS? we asked, as the elevator failed to arrive. "I'm a fan of Dan Rather so I want to know how it will turn out," she said, poking impatiently at the elevator button. So are we! Maybe we can be friends with Tina. "I'd like to see it reinvestigated, so let's put it that way," she said. "I keep missing the elevator." Since we were standing there, we thought we'd get to know her a little better.