The Fug Girls Present Their Biannual Fashion Week Awards for the Fourth TimeJust when we thought Fashion Week held no more surprises, we discovered that, as usual, we were wrong. After all, if sharing air space with K-Fed, J.Lo, and Liza Minnelli (L.Mi?) wasn’t enough to shake us out of our jaded, hard-hearted cynicism for a moment, nothing is. And though the last eight days were often exhausting and occasionally eye-crossing, they were also, as ever, tremendously fun. Here are a few highlights:
Little Girl Is Mean to Vincent Gallo at Anna SuiListen, we know we’ve said a lot about Vincent Gallo that has been, shall we say, unflattering. But we can’t help that we noticed this: At Anna Sui’s show in the tents Wednesday afternoon, Gallo sat next to a little girl who spent most of the show leaning away from him and at one point held her invitation up between them. However, and here’s the shocker, we felt bad seeing that.
Heath and Michelle: Everything’s Wrong!Michelle Williams may be leaving Boerum Hill because the brownstone she lives in is too big for just her and the baby. A pregnant Nicole Richie smoked a cigarette outside Da Silvano. Ed Westwick, a.k.a. Chuck Bass on Gossip Girl, likes playing the bad boy. (Also, he’s British!) Ryan Gosling shopped for flannel shirts at the Urban Outfitters on West 14th and also set off the store alarm. Jennifer Hudson canoodled with New York Jets free safety Kerri Rhodes at Cipriani. Joan Rivers claims her apartment was once haunted by a Jewish ghost from Larchmont. Natalie Portman couldn’t flirt her way to a table at LES restaurant Apizz. The launch party of the Supper Club at the National Arts Club was way too hot.
Stars Already Blabbing About ‘Sex and the City’ PlotVincent Gallo railed against a New York Post reporter who speculated that his penis in Brown Bunny was a prosthetic. The stars of the Sex and the City movie have all signed non-disclosure agreements regarding the plot, though Kristin Davis claims the Post is involved in some capacity. Brad Pitt bought a watch in New York. Mick Jagger barely missed a run-in with ex-wife Bianca at Cipriani in the Sherry-Netherland. Police commish Ray Kelly, who turns 66 next week, wears a hidden hearing aid. Carmen Electra hung out with Joan Jett backstage at Jones Beach.
Vincent Gallo Wants You Out of Those JeansWe’ve been spotting Vincent Gallo all over the place — that is, when we can see past the facial hair — and our curiosity finally got the better of us. Why has he been going to so many shows? Does he really know anything about fashion? Would he even deign to talk to us?
Samuel L. Jackson at a Motherfugging Y-3 ShowThematically, the Y-3 show was all about the downpour: Fake thunder rolled, minions turned a hose on the runway to create puddles, and simulated rain poured outside and down the walls of the artsy Chelsea space. Unfortunately, this cleansing drizzle didn’t reach the ratty head of actor Vincent Gallo, who sat front row in his personal grease puddle. At first Gallo just stared menacingly into middle distance, scratching his matted beard, seemingly in the midst of plotting the best way to rip off someone’s extremities with his teeth. But then Gallo turned cheerful, and we soon saw why: A wee Lord & Taylor bag — clearly swag from another show — dangled from his claws. Obviously, the sweet fumes of a department-store gift card were lifting his dour mood. We’re sure he was positively dizzy with the prospect of going necktie shopping.
Rodentia? We Hardly Even Know Ya!Sources claim Judith Regan often compared Jews to “rats” and “rodentia,” but Regan (and her lawyer) deny it. Anybody who is anybody (Harold Ford! Harvey Weinstein! Taki Theodoracopolous!) has been spotted eating at Graydon Carter’s friendly neighborhood joint, the Waverly Inn. Madonna is keen on adopting another child from Malawi, though her husband, Guy Ritchie, is not. Josh Hartnett is in an open relationship with Scarlett Johannson, which is why it’s okay he was making out with Gisele Saturday night. PayPal dumped Vincent Gallo after he tried to sell more than, uh, T-shirts on his Website. John Mara, son of late, great Giants owner Wellington, got fired from a broadcast-booth job in 1978 for slamming his fist and knocking over equipment. Adam Levine allegedly got drunk and brought three girls back to his room at the Mercer, though his rep denies it. Republican fund-raiser Georgette Mosbacher had both Dems and GOPers over for dinner at her swank Fifth Avenue digs Tuesday. Ludacris ate with Cosmo’s Kate White at Michael’s. Hugh Jackman once gave his sister a stick of deodorant for Christmas. Liz Smith claims she’s responsible for the new Rocky getting made.
Bloomberg Gets Frisky, or NotMayor Bloomberg and Diana Taylor got naked in the back of a car. (And it wasn’t as exciting as you’d think.) A special-effects guy lost a hand while filming Leo DiCaprio’s Blood Diamond. Kelly Ripa says Katie Couric avoids her. Someone took pictures of Jennifer Aniston; Aniston’s bodyguard gave chase. A 16-year-old girl posted vaguely illicit photos of herself with Vincent Gallo on her blog; the world got creeped out. Molly Sims and her boyfriend are on the rocks. Barbra Streisand’s contract requires bomb-sniffing dogs, “neatly dressed” security guards. Bono buys overpriced jeans because David Beckham does. CBS White House correspondent Bill Plante’s adult son made a weird bomb threat on Martha’s Vineyard. Ron Perelman had dinner; so did Owen Wilson and Kate Hudson. Liz Smith thinks Kim Jong Il and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad should be Time’s “People of the Year.” People hate Ann Coulter, unless they love her. Everyone hates Heather Mills. “Page Six” refutes reports that Emily White is Giacchetto’s ghostwriter, which was reported on “Page Six.” The residents of 25 Tudor City Place have an overzealous super and will have a nasty co-op meeting. It’s good to be the “Let’s get ready to rumble” guy.
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Marc Jacobs: Totally Worth the WaitWaiting to get into the Marc Jacobs show at the Armory tonight was like lining up for the new Star Wars, except with fashionistas instead of geeks. But the wait and the attendant fear that we were all about to be killed in the unholy, disorganized crush of humanity was worth it, because this was the premiere celeb spotting event of our lives.