He'll leave the ranting to Charlie.
Calls Chuck Lorre a "maggot" and wishes him "nothing but pain."
Charlie Sheen gets his wish!
Including vicious attacks on 'Two and a Half Men' creator Chuck Lorre.
Put me in, coach?
A man's gotta keep busy, after all.
You can't keep Charlie Sheen down for long.
"Work on your impulse control."
Out of, um, friendly spite.
The 'Two and a Half Men' creator ribs his star, and writes him a sad, sad poem.
Because he's "ready" to go back to work, and they're not.
And drink chocolate milk.
Because when he went to rehab, they temporarily lost their jobs.
He's released a statement, and it's kind of weird.
It's not the financial catastrophe it's made out to be, but it could be a personal one.
'Mike and Molly' and 'Rules of Engagement' may help fill the void left by 'Two and a Half Men.'
Maybe $250 million.
But Lindsay Lohan is worried.
"We are profoundly concerned for his health and well-being," says a CBS rep.
The "suitcase of coke" is not to blame.
For abdominal pains.
Plus, Amy Poehler's stock photo modeling career comes back to haunt her, on our regular late-night roundup.
"I have a high level of concern," says CBS chief Nina Tassler. "How could we not?"
He refuses to go to rehab, but CBS is concerned.
Sled dog urine is very rare.