"Deep, deep down under layers and layers of repression and ham ... there's a romantic guy down there."
With everyone grieving and sharing on Twitter and Facebook, 24-hour news has never looked more obsolete.
When our TV critic watches Morgan on nights like this, he pictures a red-eyed vulture gnawing on a neck bone.
Theory: Piers Morgan might not tank in the ratings if he was able to differentiate men from women, especially when they're famous comedians who just passed away.
To concentrate on CNN program full-time.
To concentrate on CNN post full time.
So many beefs in one segment!
Last Night on Late Night: Newly Famous Aziz Ansari Exasperates Reporters, Sets Right Rumors of On-Set Prank
Plus: Piers Morgan owes Paul McCartney an apology, and more, on our daily late-night roundup.
"Are you missing Tatum O'Neal right now?"
It's hard to get worked up about a final task that involves Dee Snider.
A lot, as you'll see from this super-cut.
Howie Mandel? Really?
"It sent me into a massive, depressive macaroni and cheese-eating tailspin."