Donatella Versace launched her menswear line last night at Barneys with a party and, first, a brief promotional appearance for her adoring public — she revealed herself in Barneys' famous windows, of course. So as we waited on Madison Avenue for Our Lady to appear, we caught this text message conversation over the shoulder of a teenage girl with a pink-sleeved iPhone:
"Dude, she's still not here"
"What's the event?"
"She's launching menswear"
"Hahaha. Well if she shows up it'll be with it"
"Yeah. if she shows up."
And with that, Donatella stepped into the window with Simon Doonan. And? She had new bangs! Ironed super flat, they certainly trumped those of Tyra Banks and Heidi Klum: These bangs did not just skim but actually covered her eyeballs. Seeing is out, people!
Aside from the clothes, the window display featured a tinfoil and cardboard Versace logo, accessorized with more tinfoil strewn about (we never would have pegged Donatella for the crafty type, but who isn't transformed in Doonan's hands?). Lest the glare of the window ruin the photographers' shots of the her do, Donatella quickly relinquished her perch behind the glass for a photo op on the sidewalk. Her entourage flooded the sidewalk in her wake, cooing about her bangs. Apparently Carlos — that's "Caaaaah-los" with a slightly rolled "r" — cut them.
Some tragically uninformed Barneys shoppers didn't care about Donatella. One scoffed on her way into the store and said, "She's, like, the most funny looking woman I've ever seen." And that's why you weren't invited to the menswear launch party, sister. The ensuing soiree took place in the men's department upstairs, where a press-shy Donatella posed for photo after photo in front of another cardboard-and-tinfoil display. A crowd of socialites and gray-haired men siphoned to Donatella's hip for photo ops. Tinsley Mortimer sidled up in a yellow gown, after checking with her cohorts to make sure it looked "slimming." She was shooed away after a few shots, but then managed to weasel her way back over a few minutes later for more pictures, at which point she was shooed away even more abruptly. She fled from the tinfoil backdrop and disappeared into the crowd of gays with black nail polish.
Related: Donatella Versace as God Intended Her: Behind Glass [Jezebel]