This morning feels like the day after prom, except we didn't just lose our virginity and we're not dying of hangover (kidding — or are we?). Last night at the Costume Institute gala, the Soirée for the World's Most Fabulous People in the World's Most Fabulous Dresses (or, this year, perhaps the Bat-Cave Ball), we worked the red carpet like a street corner on Saturday night. That is to say, we didn't actually attend. But we already know what happened inside anyway: Victoria Beckham smiled on the down low, everyone was jealous of Katie Holmes's bob and Gisele's body, and guests politely picked at their food. And it's not like the red carpet wasn't without its humor: Just take Lady Wintour's alien-walk entrance, for starters.
Ever the dutiful hostess, Anna was the first to arrive at about a quarter till seven with her daughter, Bee Shaffer. Like mother like daughter, the pair arrived wearing complicated (and thus impractical, though if there ever were a night…) gowns. Wintour wore a floor-length silver Chanel Haute Couture number with what looked like puffy antlers attached to the hips. Or maybe they were Princess Leia buns. There was a distinct Star Wars vibe going. She slowly climbed up the empty red-carpeted stairs, gripping the pillowy attachments at her sides as if to help swivel her hips, an act she methodically performed her entire walk up the stairs.
On the other side of the disorientingly wide red carpet, Bee lumbered up the stairs in perhaps the most voluminous gown of the night, a purple strapless number with leafy appliqués spilling from the bodice. More than one security guard fanned Bee's train out behind her and helped her up the stairs, lest conniving tulle and/or gravity suck her back down. She trudged along, leaving Mom to fend for herself with a few select camera crews. One such reporter even had the audacity to hold a Batman mask up to Wintour's face. Wintour promptly retreated to the other side of the carpet.
Predictably (and unfairly), the most stunning attendees of the evening were the supermodels. Gisele Bündchen looked perfect in a backless neutral Versace gown with side cutouts. In person, she obnoxiously looks as though she's never had so much as a chocolate chip in her life. Chanel Iman also looked stunning in a swirly chartreuse belted Phillip Lim gown. Since she's home-schooled, this was her version of prom. Guess she missed that whole awkward high-school phase, huh?
Kimora Lee Simmons wore one of our least favorite outfits of the night, a Kevan Hall gown she said that she helped design with André Leon Talley. Thank goodness no children with sticks were around because they might have mistaken her for an African piñata and started whacking her. She said Talley himself zipped her into the dress, which was hand-painted in Africa.
Talley was the last to arrive with his date, Venus Williams. Sadly the man who routinely wears couture muumuus and glossy navy crocodile jackets — and whose outfit we were most excited to see — was the most disappointing. He just wore a suit. To the superhero-themed ball. Thankfully everyone else made up for it.
Most Viewed Stories
Brad Pitt Fights Back Against Angelina Jolie and Her Plot to ‘Destroy’ Him
Looks Like Kate Middleton Is Enjoying the View in Canada
Trump Campaign Manager Accidentally Refers to His ‘Abuse’ of Women on Live TV
Megyn Kelly Roasts Trump’s Campaign Manager for Claiming He Doesn’t Make Sexist Comments
What It’s Like to Be a Female Reporter Covering Donald Trump
Finally Someone Called Donald Trump a Giant Baby and It Was Michelle Obama
22 Intimate Lost Photos of Marilyn Monroe
The Best Part of Being a Royal Is Getting to Pet Bunnies
Prince Married to Commoner Still Too Good to Tweet
Democratic Women Senators Are Very Concerned About Donald Trump’s Weight
From Our Partners
powered by PubExchange
The Cut’s Latest Fashion FeaturesCiara's Wedding Dress Was Too Big for the Chapel
To be fair, it was a 13 foot-long dress.You and Rihanna Will Both Want to Invest in Dior’s New Bag
It's got something for everyone.Polo Shirts Have Turned Their Back on Ryan Lochte
Along with his other major sponsors.Ryan Lochte Will No Longer Be Paid to Wear Tiny Bathing Suits
Speedo remains committed to transparency.Laura Brown Is the New Editor-in-Chief of InStyle
After 11 years at Harper’s Bazaar.Tyra Banks Is Going to Teach a Class on Smizing at Stanford
"If I see somebody not paying attention, I’m gonna call on them."This Floating Pier Is the Most Zen Installation Ever
Walking on water in Italy.Nation Is Appalled by Matt Lauer’s Nude Ankles During Ryan Lochte Interview
What’s the opposite of “Jeah”?8 People at the Life of Pablo Pop-up Explain Why Kanye West Is a God
"I mean, Kanye West is just Kanye West. There's not more or less you can say about Kanye West. He's just Mr. West!"A T-shirt Is Enough
Simplicity, versatility, and cool. What more could you want?
She took a perfect pencil dive off a 30-foot yacht.American Apparel Is Being Sued by Former Workers
As the company considers putting itself up for sale.A Gendered History of the Tailored Suit
From Marlon Brando to Coco Chanel.How Zendaya Developed Such Great Style at the Young Age of 19
The star's best looks from Disney to now.Proof That If You’re Chic Enough, a Little Federal Investigation Doesn’t Matter
Is this the best they could do?5,300-Year-Old Mummified Iceman Probably Would’ve Been a Street-Style Star
He had several different looks and was “pretty picky.”J.Crew Has Identified 226 Shades of Pink
Even more than there are shades of gray.Gigi and Bella Hadid Merch Is Now Somehow a Thing That Is Happening
Today in Hadidiana.Gird Your Loins for the Return of Yeezy to New York Fashion Week
The season approaches.This Indie Brand Had a Great Response to Ivanka Trump
When she bought one of their cuffs, they donated the proceeds to the Clinton campaign.