Simon Doonan was a little bored at the CFDA Awards ceremony last Monday, so he decided to "inject [the] proceedings with a little raucous silliness." When he took to the podium to present Belgian designer Dries Van Noten with the International Award he started by pontificating on a TV show he'd love to see happen: The Real Housewives of Antwerp (Belgian Bravo, are you listening?!). No one cracked a smile, unsurprisingly, since even if they do watch the Real Housewives of New York/Orange County (and honestly, how can one turn away from such surgically enhanced bitter souls?), that crowd would never admit it by laughing.
In the face of deafening silence, Doonan tried a different topic: André Leon Talley's turban. Talley wore the Yigal Azrouël headpiece that evening clasped with a diamond-encrusted Fred Leighton pin. Doonan suggested Talley "hock 'the fabulous diamond pin on that turban which you rented to come here tonight' and use the resulting moolah to fund my Antwerp Housewives show." Crickets chirped. Doonan writes in the New York Observer:
My intention in singling out this remarkable accessory was to express solidarity with the wearer, the majestically life-enhancing Mr. Talley.
It didn’t work.
André was not amused. The phrase “visibly affronted” would best describe his reaction. Ditto his date, Naomi Campbell … Of all the people in that room, André, the Ab-fabulous, the brilliant, was the last person on earth I wished to offend. My goal — please believe me, André dahling! — was the complete opposite. I failed.
The next morning Doonan sent Talley an effusive apology note with a side of orchids. If it's any consolation, Simon dear, the rest of the world finds your speech hilarious.
Most Viewed Stories
Rob Kardashian and Blac Chyna Reportedly Broke Up
Donald Trump Spent the Morning After the Debate Fat-Shaming Miss Universe, Again
It’s Finally Possible to Understand What Happened to Amanda Knox
Hillary Clinton’s Sickest Debate Burns
Ask a Boss: My Co-worker Wants Everyone to Call Her Boyfriend Her ‘Master’!
2009 Called — It Wants Its Vogue-Versus-Bloggers Fight Back.
22 Intimate Lost Photos of Marilyn Monroe
Former Miss Universe Becomes U.S. Citizen So She Can Vote Against Trump
Area Woman Interrupted by Man 25 Times in 26 Minutes
Our Scowling Hero Breaks a Smile
From Our Partners
powered by PubExchange
The Cut’s Latest Fashion FeaturesCiara's Wedding Dress Was Too Big for the Chapel
To be fair, it was a 13 foot-long dress.You and Rihanna Will Both Want to Invest in Dior’s New Bag
It's got something for everyone.Polo Shirts Have Turned Their Back on Ryan Lochte
Along with his other major sponsors.Ryan Lochte Will No Longer Be Paid to Wear Tiny Bathing Suits
Speedo remains committed to transparency.Laura Brown Is the New Editor-in-Chief of InStyle
After 11 years at Harper’s Bazaar.Tyra Banks Is Going to Teach a Class on Smizing at Stanford
"If I see somebody not paying attention, I’m gonna call on them."This Floating Pier Is the Most Zen Installation Ever
Walking on water in Italy.Nation Is Appalled by Matt Lauer’s Nude Ankles During Ryan Lochte Interview
What’s the opposite of “Jeah”?8 People at the Life of Pablo Pop-up Explain Why Kanye West Is a God
"I mean, Kanye West is just Kanye West. There's not more or less you can say about Kanye West. He's just Mr. West!"A T-shirt Is Enough
Simplicity, versatility, and cool. What more could you want?
She took a perfect pencil dive off a 30-foot yacht.American Apparel Is Being Sued by Former Workers
As the company considers putting itself up for sale.A Gendered History of the Tailored Suit
From Marlon Brando to Coco Chanel.How Zendaya Developed Such Great Style at the Young Age of 19
The star's best looks from Disney to now.Proof That If You’re Chic Enough, a Little Federal Investigation Doesn’t Matter
Is this the best they could do?5,300-Year-Old Mummified Iceman Probably Would’ve Been a Street-Style Star
He had several different looks and was “pretty picky.”J.Crew Has Identified 226 Shades of Pink
Even more than there are shades of gray.Gigi and Bella Hadid Merch Is Now Somehow a Thing That Is Happening
Today in Hadidiana.Gird Your Loins for the Return of Yeezy to New York Fashion Week
The season approaches.This Indie Brand Had a Great Response to Ivanka Trump
When she bought one of their cuffs, they donated the proceeds to the Clinton campaign.