Yep, that's her in the "Oval Office" alright, with her "husband Barack" and "daughter" (typing this feels so weird). And oh look!
On the first time she met Barack Obama with Kimora Lee Simmons.
"My friend Kimora Lee Simmons and I were walking around the ball. We had on these big Cinderella dresses — hardly anyone wore white tie, but we both did — and then we see Senator Obama. He goes, 'Hi, ladies,' and I told him, 'I want to congratulate you on that speech. It was gorgeous.' At the time, there was just a hint of him running for president. But then Kimora starts talking crazy, just totally embarrassing me. She walks away, and I'm like, 'Senator Obama, I have to apologize for my friend. She's almost like family, I've known her since I was 17 years old, and with family, you love them but sometimes you want to say that you're not related to them.' And he said, 'What are you talking about? You don't think that I could be down and talk crazy like that? You think politicians are all stiff and can't relate? Come on, girl.'"
She explains why Michelle Obama is so important that she had to dress up as her for the photo shoot.
“With Barack Obama, his becoming president is them becoming president because Michelle was there from the beginning. Without Michelle, he wouldn’t be there … Michelle Obama, you’re one hot mama.”
Just to remind you she would have no trouble doing it because she's so gosh darn confident, she wants the next First Lady to eat fried chicken in front of cameras.
“Oh, I want her to not take herself too seriously. She’d need to know how to take a fierce picture but at the same time be able to eat fried chicken, have grease on her fingers, and be okay with getting photographed like that, too. I’d want her to feel like every child in America is hers — to have a true connection.”
If she were First Lady, she would have a hair conundrum.
“…my question isn’t to flip or not to flip. Mine would be to weave or not to weave.”
But would have no trouble figuring out her Secret Service acronym.
“KMFA: Kiss My Fat Ass.”
Oooh, she offers a blind item on a retiring supermodel!
“I told her to make sure she had a plan. She looked like I slapped her in the face. She was like, ‘Want do you mean? I love modeling. I will always model!’ … But you need to treat yourself like an athlete and know that it is not going to happen. I mean, what are you gonna do — commentate on ESPN? … And here comes Gisele doing the Clydesdale clomp in Stella McCartney.”
Obviously, she can't go anywhere without women spilling their deepest, darkest secrets to her.
“I had a woman come up to me when I was seeing Rent once. She told me she was going to commit suicide until she saw that show. I held her hand and cried with her in the aisle. I get that kind of stuff; it doesn’t stop.”
And just to make doubly sure you know how down she is with consuming calories.
“Barack and Michelle, you might be going to the White House. But I’m going to White Castle.”
American Dream [Harper's Bazaar]