Unlike most shows, which sit their famous guests all in a line, the folks at Pamella Roland on Tuesday dotted them around the front rows, almost as if to create separate viewing areas, or a celebrity buffet: Start over here with a taste of Alfre Woodard, then wander around and consider a helping of Nigel and Crissy Barker before spying a Brooke Shields carving station and deciding you have a taste for something iconic.
Shields certainly tried her best to break off a piece for everyone, answering any question that came her way. We couldn't always hear her, and sometimes we were hypnotized by how ridiculously good-looking she is, but we think she was talking about her hopes that whatever her girls grow up to do, it involves going to college — not a particularly revolutionary viewpoint from a Princeton grad, but one we nevertheless endorse. We suggest Brooke cut off their access to MTV, or else they might think fake jobs at magazines are just as good. Shields also talked about how she only discovered Roland a few months ago, and how much she enjoys coming to shows: "When it becomes a chore or a job, that's when it's time to step back and reassess." We can think of a few celebs who could stand to remember that when they decide to throw a strop about their (free, excellent) seats.
That being said, everybody at Roland was pretty pleasant. We spotted Real Housewives of New York's Ramona and Alex, who seemed to be perfectly civil and nice to each other despite the fact that, in the past, Ramona has made no secret of the fact that she thinks Alex's husband, Simon — who was AWOL — is creepy and weird. Maybe, because they didn't appear to be on the clock, they didn't see any need to air any dirty laundry. Across the runway from Shields, Mena Suvari plopped down next to Life Unexpected's Shiri Appleby and started telling her a story that, based on her animated facial expressions, was a doozy. Never do we long for super-powered hearing more than when we're in New York. We also walked past Miss J Alexander lounging in the front row and spinning what seemed to be a great yarn about seats at Fashion Week. We don't know how it began, but it was about an unnamed company that once decided to exclude him from attending its shows. "And they've been SHIT ever since," he drawled. "And they know who they are." He cocked an eyebrow at a camera to punctuate it. We wish we knew who it was, but whoever it is, we suspect they have been or are about to get served.
After the show, Appleby — who is attending her first-ever fashion shows — started heading backstage. "We just need to lock down the jewelry, and then we can let you back," a PR girl told Appleby. Surely nobody thinks any of these celebrities has sticky fingers. The economy isn't THAT bad. We hope at least nobody saw a need to lock down the dress Shiri was wearing. It was hot pink with gold trim, and Shiri looked really cute in it, so we think she should've gotten to take it home. You know, kind of like sticking stuff from the dessert table in your purse. It's practically a buffet rite of passage.