This week’s Project Runway challenge was unprecedented, or so they keep telling us, and when we first heard that the prize was to have a design on the cover of Marie Claire, we were very curious about whose publicity team would allow their client to participate in such a dubious stunt. So when ed-in-chief Joanna Coles revealed the cover model to be . Heidi Klum! ... we were way less confused about the whole thing. You know what that’s called? Synergy. ‘Cause we had a feeling that if Coles approached, say, Beyoncé’s manager and said, “We’re so excited to have she who is formerly known as Sasha Fierce on the cover, but instead of putting her in a real designer dress, we’re going to have her wear a burlap sack by an unknown (that was made in 24 hours),” well, we think Bey-Bey would be like, “I’m Leaving.”
Why are we wasting precious recap space going into this? Because nothing happened during this episode. This is the little that we learned: Seth Aaron is annoying, Mila is fake and cocky, and JaneJane has very low self-esteem. Also, who is Ben, again? This week’s challenge really did have an awesome prize — everyone was very quiet and concentrated, which made for a subdued hour of TV. JaneJane predicted that she and Anna were going to be in the bottom two, which was accurate, and we don’t think there was one instance of a contestant talking about his/herself in the third person. On to the runway, where the judges were joined by Coles, whose pithy, on-point comments made us wish she were there every week.
1 of 12
Amy had immunity this week, which is perhaps why she took the risk of showing a print. The dress, remember, has to accommodate cover lines, and so we’re not sure this bright, summery creation could actually work on the magazine. That said, the print is, dare we say, fun and flirty (it’s for a women’s mag, so forgive us if we speak in women’s-mag lingo), but we’re not digging the huge boob flower, nor are we fans of the vaguely maternity-like cut.
2 of 12
Heidi Does Sci-Fi
This futuristic silvery suit is interesting and fits well, but how is it appropriate for a spring cover of Marie Claire? It’s not. But Seth Aaron’s safe anyway, here another week to annoy us all.
3 of 12
We’re Off To See The Wizard
It’s sort of hard to see the detail on this little emerald cocktail dress. There’s weaving in the middle, which we could do without, but that neckline is hot.
4 of 12
Anna – the Loser!
Oh, dear, Anna really f-ed this up. A light-blue flowy blouse paired with a cropped silver vest paired with … menswear-inspired shorts? WHAT? Nina points out that the outfit “gives her no shape whatsoever,” but Coles gets in the best zinger (watch out Michael, she’s taking your crown!): “It’s like three ingredients in a dish that leave you feeling slightly nauseous.” Michael points out that Marie Claire is not a teen magazine, and Heidi says it’s “dreadful.” So Anna gets the boot, a deserved choice. Bye-bye, Anna! We hope one day to buy your line at Anthropologie.
5 of 12
Visions of the Sea
Yay for Anthony! Anthony says his light-turquoise minidress was “inspired by Heidi,” which is why he made the clean lines and formfitting shape. “The costume drama is over — you’ve entered modern times!” announces MK, to cheers. Nina calls the color “fantastic,” and Coles says, “it makes me feel glad that spring is here.” After Heidi announced that Anthony won, they had a lovely moment of joyful screaming, Heidi joining in the fun. “I really can’t wait to wear it on the cover,” she tells him. Aw.
6 of 12
Bridesmaid from Hell
Janeane’s washed-out take on a bridesmaid's dress got poor marks from the judges. Heidi says, “It’s not fashion-forward,” and Coles adds, “I’m not getting the beach reference, unless it’s a polluted sea with plastic bottles in it.” Heh. It’s “too bridal,” says Nina. For that, and for including a random bolero, Jane-Jane lands in the bottom two.
7 of 12
What is a Jog Bra?
Overly confident Mila was given a reality check this week, when her colorblocked mini landed in the bottom three. Michael was especially funny about it. “That peach comes off as ace bandage … she’s in a weird jog bra in a V-neck.” Aw, he said jog bra instead of sports bra. Is that like an older-person thing, or just 'cause he’s a man? Nina says the arrows look like they’re pointing at her crotch, and Coles calls it “the color of hospital food.” Mila’s safe, but probably a bit deflated, which we can only imagine pleased her fellow contestants.
8 of 12
Emilio’s in the top three with this deep-pink mini, but no one’s actually jumping out of their seat about it. Personally, we think it’s pretty cheesy, though we see how the color would work on a cover. “This dress will beckon people to grab a magazine,” says Coles, but it “feels junior” to Nina. The judges have an unprecedented redesign session with Emilio on the runway - they ask him to cut off the straps and take out the model’s ponytail. “It’s great!” says Coles of the final product. To us, it’s better, but still not great.
9 of 12
Nice Day for a White Wedding
Jay’s big, flowy cream dress is certainly dramatic. That is all we have to say about that.
10 of 12
Eeeek! Jonathan brags about the perfect seams of this strange romper, but we think we can see the outline of the model’s nether regions. Gross.
11 of 12
Does this cowl-neck creation look like part of a coral reef, or maybe more like a mushroom? Let us know your thoughts.
12 of 12
The blue-yellow-brown color combo of Ben’s dress is interesting, to say the least. He calls it “Madame Butterfly in Technicolor,” and MK points out that it will certainly “cut through the noise” of the newsstand. Coles calls it a “real contender.” We like its bold feeling, but Ben, the wide black belt? Why, God, why??