For the month of Thanksgiving, food-themed editorials abounded — and, as to be expected, they looked completely unappetizing. While saying fashion magazines produce beautiful images is an understatement, that is hardly ever true when food is their subject. When food was not in the picture, the beach may have been, providing lovely settings for Surface and Vogue. Increasingly well-known plus-size face Robyn Lawley appeared, almost imperceptibly, in Dazed & Confused. Of course, the super-famous were also present, from Miss Piggy in In Style to Courtney Love in Vanity Fair. See those images and more from the November issues in the slideshow.
Most Thought-Provoking Editorial - Dazed & Confused
Look past the disturbingly bloody near-nakedness in these images, and you could see this story, titled "Vive La Decadence," as a commentary on the plight of the world's economy. Look where all that indulgence has left us — listless, exposed, mangled — and so forth. You could also look at it as a statement about a fashion "issue," since plus-size model Robyn Lawley appears, almost imperceptibly, in this editorial. And after a long, ongoing fight for industry acceptance, she has been left bloodied, exposed, mangled along the way. Or maybe the pictures mean nothing at all.
Creepiest Carnie Theme - Lula
Lula has a habit of making its prepubescent-looking models look exploited, and this is no exception.
Creepiest Fur Editorial - Harper's Bazaar
What can the dog and horse possibly be thinking? "Me next?"
Best Way to Make Food Look Unappetizing - British Vogue
It's actually hard to recall seeing food that looked good in a fashion magazine. But try as they might, this will not deter normal people from enjoying food around the holidays.
Best Way to Make Food Look Unappetizing (a Tie!) - Paper
[Refraining from making revolting comparisons]
Oddest Movie Homage - Vogue
Vogue expalins, "With War Horse’s Jeremy Irvine, model Arizona Muse evokes the rigor and romance of wartime England, in lean lines, simple silhouettes, and a stark palette." War and its carnage and sadness are the perfect landscape for some clothes with good lines.
Most Unexpected Portrait - Courtney Love in Vanity Fair
A striking departure from her black, see-through, and sometimes simply nonexistent dresses.
Best Actress Portrait - Miss Piggy in In Style
Nope, she's still not old.
Best Postapocalyptic Menswear Editorial - Surface
If you're going to go for a "world is ending" theme, really go for it and hire a model who can play dead.
Most Provocative Pose - Flaunt
Maybe he's just making sure that, beneath those pink lamé panties, his manhood is intact.
Best Romantic/Weepy Seaside Theme - Vogue
Mom is dipping some Alexander McQueen in the ocean there, teaching her child that later, when the macaroni and cheese is on the table, her daughter may as well drag her sleeves right through it.
Weakest Girl Fight - W
There is nothing convincing about girls with such skinny limbs brawling — or doing any physical activity, for that matter.
Worst Texture Combination - Cosmopolitan
If you can shampoo your jacket and comb your skirt, one of them has got to go.
Hairiest Diva - Mary J. Blige in Elle
That's Gucci hair, mind you.
Most Romantic Use of Toilet Paper - British Vogue
Looks like those two have something serious going on.
Best Naked Fairies - Dazed & Confused
It's like a dark and dirty FernGully.
Most Ridiculous Wreath - WSJ.
Beats the kind most people put on their doors for Christmas.
Worst Story Illustration - GQ
What may be more amazing than the vagina-less woman is that GQ ran a first-person confessional about a man living today who — wait for the big confession! — likes porn.
Worst Denim - BlackBook
It's hard to look at this and not remember how it's been done, better, before.
Best Sad Model in the Woods Editorial - Lula
While it's a theme that's been explored many times before in fashion magazines, here we are treated to an expressive moment with a pine cone.
Best Male Crop Top - Flaunt
The determination in his face is what sells it: "I am. Wearing. A crop top."
Most Elaborate Head Decorations - Surface
Maybe this is the kind of crap "recessionistas" who can't afford full pieces of clothing are buying these days.
Most Unnecessary Naked Women - GQ
This month, GQ does glamping, and apparently to them that means being in the woods with a woman who is always naked.
Best Dude Wearing Gardening Gloves - Flaunt
Either that or he just killed someone.
Most Distant Model - Canadian Fashion
She's probably not even trying to model — she's just angry after having to walk all the way up there in her costume.
Best Designer Portrait - Marchesa's Georgina Chapman and Keren Craig in Elle (with Olivia Wilde)
You don't need wacky props or scenarios when your subjects are such pretty women and pretty dresses.
Best Reason Not to Get So Worked Up About the Existence of Photoshop - Dazed & Confused
At this point, you have to look at most fashion images with the same sense of belief as you would with this image, so wildly retouched are they. Not that that is the way things should be, but let's stop fooling ourselves — that's the way it is.
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