The People's Choice Awards were a mostly forgettable melange of black and shiny dresses worn by a group of people that was painfully hard to mentally place from their career achievements alone (if a testament to the power of things you might suppose people don't care about anymore, like High School Musical or Dancing With the Stars). Last night, one after the People's Choice Awards, a mostly different crowd of much more recognizable names turned up for the Critics' Choice Awards. Again, the attending actors wore a lot of black dresses, which is seldom a great color for the red carpet because it can easily wash people out and, the detail often never fully realized in photos of these outfits, makes people look like floating heads and arms behind an old-fashioned printer ink splotch.
Hopefully, this is a a realization the stars will come to on their own before the Golden Globes on Sunday. Remember how unexpected and fun it was when so many people wore emerald green to those awards last year? We can't expect 99 percent of these people to wear anything that's truly cool, lest they alienate the vast majority of potential fans that doesn't pay attention to or care about runway fashion, but if they're going to dress from a place of fear, may they at least feel the rainbow on their sinewy, juice-fasted bodies. In the slideshow, see what Kirsten Dunst, Elle Fanning, Elizabeth Olsen, and more wore to the Critics' Choice Awards last night.
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Her Sharon Osbourne-esque look of late makes me miss the old her, which may not have been perfect from a fashion perspective (though she was wearing leopard print long before the rest of the trend-hungry), but was more interesting than a designer bedding display at Macy's.
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See what happens with the black? You know this must be more interesting than it looks, and thanks to the bit of structure on the waist detailing you can see that it is, but especially on a drab, gray, Sears-portrait quality step-and-repeat (what the hell, Critics' Choice?), it's a dismal, funereal even, effect.
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For a 51-year-old, a look like this makes sense for a psuedo-serious award show. The coloring may be a little Hostess Cupcake/Oreo cookie/whatever but it's an example of breaking up black to make it more palatable in a red carpet photo.
The sad thing about this outfit is that the shoes, the most interesting part, don't even get any air time unless the red carpet photographers ask her to hike up her dress and show them off.
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This Azzedine Alaia dress and side braid business is an unusual choice for the red carpet, and works on Charlize, though any other less-blessed woman who tried to wear a fishtail gown with tumor-y protrusions from the hips down might just look like a stack of spare tires.
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Is that a Ouiga board on her collar bones? Something to do in case she gets bored inside?
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For the record, this dress is Pucci, not a game of Parcheesi.
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Stacy Keibler and George Clooney
In yesterday's People's Choice slideshow we played a little game where we explained who everyone was, because so many people who walk red carpets are impossible to place with their myriad of reality dance telvision and High School Musical associations that brought them there. So, how much do you know about Stacy Keibler? She is "best known for her work with World Championship Wrestling(WCW) and World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE)," Wikipedia tells us. "She began her professional wrestling career as a part of the Nitro Girls in WCW. She quickly moved on to a more prominent role in the company as the manager, Miss Hancock (sometimes "Handcock")," the article continues. "Despite wearing business suits, her character was known to climb on top of the announcers' table and dance sensually. It was also during this period that she began using what would become her trademark ring entrance: slowly putting her forty-two inch legs through the second tier of ropes, pausing to let the crowd momentarily see her panties." Also, she was on Dancing With the Stars.
So far, from a red carpet style standpoint, she's been poised and inoffensively dressed as George Clooney's arm candy, the color of her panties consistently and happily a mystery. She's undergoing a perfectly decent sartorial evolution.
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This little infusion of springtime relief is Rodarte.
This is an example of a black dress that has enough texture and stuff going on to photograph well. But still, don't you kind of wish it was a color? Like NEON ORANGE? Just for the sake of us having one clearly scary dress in this bunch?
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"Uterus" is probably not the word you want people to think when they look at you wearing a dress.
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Even if you don't like Emma Stone's clothes, she looks fantastic pretty much all the time because she looks sincerely happy when she goes to these things. I don't much care for these keyhole things here but I predict a good outfit from her on Sunday.
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Beyonce would most definitely approve of the dense sequining of this dress.
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I don't dislike how minimal this is, but I wish there was just one more element to the look. A lipstick, a ring, a bracelet, an empty handbag, a rhinestone tattoo (remember those?). Just one visual punch.
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I went from not knowing who this was until yesterday to rapidly falling in love with Carrie Keagan as a red carpet person. "MEEE!" her photos say, in moment after moment of touching honesty.
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I like this color but it also calls to mind a big set of human gums.
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Michelle reliably wears more unusual things that tend to suit her, which I love, but I'm mixed on this color-blocking. What say you? And while you're down there, do feel free to share your hopes/dreams/disinterest in the Golden Globes red carpet happening Sunday in the comments.