She tackles nails in her latest memo for V magazine, and let's just say if your manicure isn't perfect, she thinks you're a slob. To keep things classy, her list of six reasons why well-groomed nails are a must includes this gem: "You'll be ready for sex or to put a penis in your hand." (The column comes with a bunch of sharp and spiky nail options which would, presumably, make the whole "penis-in-hand" deal kind of risky.) Besides, stop it with all this dirty talk, Gaga. You're making us blush.