Looking at Splash News' grainy pictures of Robert Pattinson "getting close to a mystery blonde" at the Electric Room last night (same night LiLo and Dina brawled after partying there) is like looking at a cloud: What you see says as much about your disposition as it does about the image before you. Is it a K-Stew competitor? A long-haired gentleman? Cousin Itt? Orlando Bloom in Lord of the Rings elf costume? Lindsay Lohan herself?
For, embedded in every juicy rumor, is a latent fear or wish. Case in point: Taylor Swift "hooked up with two [Kennedy] cousins on consecutive nights," because we fear that Taylor is a social climber and wish to turn our virginal pop stars into whores.
Come to think of it, does Taylor have an alibi for last night? Or — wait — do we know what LiLo and Dina fought about, yet?