We're finally approaching the mythical date of December 21, 2012, which the Mayans tell us will mean the end of the world as we know it. Since we've only got a few days left, we've decided to get an early start on our resolution to go out in style, taking advantage of the simple fact that we won’t have to pay our credit cards in 2013. For our purposes, we imagined fashion-heaven looking something like Versailles, permeated with the scent of Serge Leutens. It’s a place where we perpetually picnic with Daphne Guinness and Emanuelle Alt on an Hermès Blanket whilst being served La Duree macaroons by Prince Harry and Johnny Depp. We would all try on each other’s brilliant new purchases, remarking at the fun we had spending $789,318 in just a few hours of online shopping. Hopefully it all arrives before we disappear. And, while we all wait, click through our spending rampage — La Mer as body lotion, men’s croc-skin accessories, fur, lingerie, a white Valextra suitcase, Alaïa shoes, and more — then tell us what you would throw in your own Apocalypse Shopping Cart. End times are nigh, and there’s no end to things we’d buy if money were no object.
Reading Material: $6,600
“When the Internet goes down and one can no longer access the Cut, reading material is a must. Luckily, this American classic is now available for you to buy online, but act quickly! We’ve only got a few days.” —Kurt Soller ----- Visionaire x Louis Vuitton Portfolio, $6,600 at Mr. Porter
Rock-Slut Outfit: $9,597.80
"My kids will be all, 'Mommy, why do you look like Kate Moss?'" —Stella Bugbee ---- Moto stretch-leather skinny pants by the Row, $1,850 at Net-a-Porter; Metal-embellished suede boots by Azzedine Alaïa, $1,249.80 at Net-a-Porter; Rouge/Black Fur Jacket by Balmain, $ 6,498 at Shopstyle.
Face Cream As Body Lotion: $1,900
"Instead of parsing out tiny drops of this rich facial mousturizer, I'd take a long soak in a bathtub filled with Tom Ford's Jasmine perfume, then slather this over every inch of my body." —SB ----- Creme de la Mer, 16.5 oz., $1,900 at Nieman Marcus
Sexy Lingerie: $1,500
"A slight upgrade from my normal everyday underwear." —SB ----- Cordeliyah Basque in navy/gold by Agent Provacateur, $1,500 at Agent Provocateur, or call 1-888-881-4986
The (Last) Day Look: $1,980
"A super cozy cashmere sweater adds such much-needed whimsy and wit to These Dire Times. I'd wear it with a classic plaid button-down, by Michael Bastian, because I don’t want the whole world to die thinking: Oh, God, Kurt hates American designers." —KS ----- Puppy Cashmere Sweater by Burberry Prorsum, $1,495 at Park and Bond; Sport Shirt by Michael Bastian, $485 at Park and Bond.
“I have to assume that the reason Barneys’ most expensive suitcase online comes only in white is because it’s meant for a trip to visit angels up in the clouds as some sort of post-Mayan White Party. I’d gift this one to Stella before we go, because I’m a suck-up until the day I die.” —KS ----- Large Trolley by Valextra, $8,770 at Barneys
Gratuitous Towel: $550.00
"There's really no reason to own these, ever, other than to be like 'That's right bitches, I dry myself with Hermès towels.' Seems like a good enough reason right now." —SB ----- Trois Chaînes d'Ancre Hermes printed beach towel by Hermes, $550 at Hermes
Suit, Scarf, and Coat: $7,995
“I am a sucker for the glamour/rock/Italian aspects of Gucci. I also still love camo, even though the trend is tired, and this accessory would bring the suit into more, uh, casual territory. On top, a Salvatore Ferragamo Shearling coat, which is the perfect mid-thigh length. Because, even if the world is ending, it's still winter, duh.” —KS ----- Slim-Fit Wool Suit by Gucci, $1,900 at Mr. Porter; Camo Fur Scarf by Albertus Swanepoel, $2,395 at Barneys; Shearling Jacket by Salvatore Ferragamo, $3,700 at Park and Bond
The Fancy Dress: $6,198.61
"I'll make this my nightgown." —SB ----- Evening Gown by Alexander Mcqueen, $6,198.61 at Far Fetch
Men's Shoes: $2,526
“If the apocalypse is upon us, I’ll need some shit-kicking boots for my last days on Earth. But I can only imagine I’ll want something more comfortable for the afterlife. These high-fashion sandals will be just perfect for hell’s arid conditions and are nice enough to make Jesus himself jealous.” —KS ----- 30 MM Leather Boots by Balmain, $1531 at Luisa Via Roma; Woven Leather Sandals by Dolce & Gabbana, $995 at Luisa Via Roma
The Princess Necklace: $117,915
"Because the Cut is devoted to service journalism, I wanted readers to be able to buy this practical piece online." —SB ----- Rose Cut Diamond Necklace by Monique Péan, $117,915 at Barneys
"A woman can never have too many trench coats. Come to think of it, it would work well over that lingerie, even though I wouldn't be able to flash anybody because technically it has no arms." —SB ----- Cape Trench by Junya Watanabe Comme Des Garcons , $739 at Barneys
Crocodile Accessories: $9,355
“Men on the brink of demise ought to go for lustrous, luxe, totally ludicrous crocodile skin. Santiago Gonzalez makes the best, so I’d test the line out in an array of finishes with a backpack (hands-free!), wallet, card case, dopp kit, and iPad case. The flask is fake crocodile, but it still matches. And, at this point, whiskey will be more important than most other things. I’m just being practical.” —KS ----- Crocodile Backpack by Santiago Gonzalez, $5,500 at Mr. Porter; Crocodile iPad Case by Santiago Gonzalez: $1,950 at Mr. Porter; Crocodile Billfold by Santiago Gonzalez, $585 at Mr. Porter; Dopp Kit Santiago Gonzalez, $1,275 at Mr. Porter; Crocodile Print Flask by J.Crew, $45 at Mr. Porter
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