Michelle Obama Bangs Result of Midlife Crisis

First lady Michelle Obama speaks during an interactive student workshop with the cast and crew of the film Beasts of the Southern Wild at the State Dining Room of the White House February 13, 2013 in Washington, DC. Photo: Alex Wong/Getty Images

In a Skype interview set to air Wednesday, Michelle Obama told Rachael Ray the motivation behind the divisive new haircut. "This is my midlife crisis," she said, "jokingly," according to the AP. She added that she cut her bangs for her 49th birthday because she couldn't get a sports car and wouldn't be allowed to bungee jump. And when you think about it, there aren't many outlets for a First Lady in midlife crisis. She can't really quit her job and, as luck would have it, she couldn't possibly get into better physical shape. Flirting with younger men is out, for propriety's sake, as is procuring a small amount of her salad days drug of choice. Even dressing the teensiest bit young can draw a lot of negative attention when you're Michelle Obama. It was basically down to bangs, a tattoo, or pressuring Sasha and Malia to fulfill her girlhood dreams. Not that she has to choose!