Breaking: Magic Powders Won’t Make You Skinny

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According to the Federal Trade Commission, all of those commercials telling you that you can achieve impeccable abs by doing nothing more than using your forearm to sprinkle magic weight-loss dust on your food are — wait for it — lying. Yesterday, the FTC charged Sensa Products, L’Occitane, HCG Diet Direct, and LeanSpa with making deceptive marketing claims to sell their products. Slogans like “Get a gym body without going to the gym,” and "trim 1.3 inches in just 4 weeks," according to the Commission, make getting rid of your muffin top sound super easy when, in fact, there's no actual science to back it up — shocking! "The chances of being successful just by sprinkling something on your food, rubbing cream on your thighs, or using a supplement are slim to none. The science just isn't there," Jessica Rich, the director of the FTC's Bureau of Consumer Protection, said in a statement.

The four companies will have to pay a collective $34 million to refund customers who bought their cellulite-fighting creams and pound-melting drops, and the FTC is planning to crack down on more companies that may be making fraudulent weight-loss claims in the future. Meanwhile, we saw an ad for this new magic beanstalk serum that will totally get rid of earlobe fat in five hours if you apply it while eating ice cream. And it can be yours for only three installments of $19.99!