Apple Won’t Sell a Female-Masturbation App

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What could possibly be offensive about an adorable anthropomorphic vulva who wants to teach women how to masturbate? According to the Apple app overlords, quite a bit. In disappointing news for those awaiting the educational female-masturbation app HappyPlayTime, designer Tina Gong reports that the app has been rejected from the Apple iTunes store. Their message to her:

Your app HappyPlayTime has been reviewed, but we are unable to post this version. For details, or to directly contact the App Review team, visit the Resolution Center in the iTunes Connect. Do not reply to this email.

According HappyPlayTime, 46.6 percent of women masturbate less than once a month. The crowd-funded app was intended to help remove  stigma and taboo associated with self pleasure. In the six-level interactive, a vagina named Happy gives anatomy lessons and visually instructs users on the how and where of self-stimulation. Gong hoped that by getting women really familiar with their anatomy, they'd get more comfortable taking control of their own sexual pleasure.

So will Gong fight for the rights of her cheery vulva? “I considered creating a petition to let us in, but as far as I know, Apple tends to be pretty steadfast in their choices to accept or reject something, even with a large supporter group. Ultimately, my feeling is that it would be a waste of energy to argue with them," Gong wrote in a post. 

The project isn't dead, however. Instead of an app, Gong and her team are turning HappyPlayTime into a web-based game. Vive la vulva!