U.S. Soccer Hottie, Still Hot Despite Shameful Engagement Photos

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Photo: Matt Clayton

Soccer player Kyle Beckerman currently holds the title of hottest member of Team USA. While his title is rife with conflict — wildly attractive with white-man dreads goes against all my college-learned disdain for the Phish-loving hacky-sack players who practiced capoeira on the quad — I’m not above collective obsession. And one  afternoon spent fully succumbing to fantasy and Google-searching returned a treasure trove. Here are Beckerman’s engagement photos, prominently featuring his famed dreads, his then-fiancée (now-wife) Kate, a canoe, and a ridiculous mountain-man hat. Still into it? Me too. What voodoo do you do, Beckerman, that suddenly makes me approve of both tribal tattoos and canoes as romantic settings?