Bradley Cooper’s Balls: Foregrounded on a National Magazine Cover

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Photo: Vanity Fair

Monthly testicles communiqué Vanity Fair has declared that Bradley Cooper has standard male anatomy and congratulated him for this achievement with a magazine cover and an informative headline: "BRADLEY COOPER HAS BALLS!" In defense of verbal expression generally, the latter two words are folded in half as if they are embarrassed to exist. On the other hand, Mr. Cooper is playing billiards, so there are literal balls in front of him. Tangentially, that Angela Merkel cue ball would make a festive Christmas ornament.