Nick Jonas Demonstrates the Worst Pickup Tactic Ever on Scream Queens

Nick Jonas’s character Boone was “killed off” early on in this Scream Queens season, but returned last night as “a ghost” with a special pass from heaven allowing him to return to earth to do one thing: seduce the woman of his dreams, Zayday.

Actually, as we can see from this video, he returned mostly to murder people — but also to demonstrate that faking your own death and convincing people you’re a spirit in order to sleep with them is a seduction tactic not even a Jonas can pull off. I understand that Patrick Swayze (Ghost) and Devon Sawa (Casper) might have made convincing arguments for ghostly love, but trust us on this one.

However, in teaching the world what not to do (refresher: pretend you’re a ghost), Boone did show us one line that might work: the “Thanks, it’s boyfriend material” response to a comment about his shirt? That was gold.