Martha Stewart Begs Millennials to Just Grow a Little Tomato Plant on Their Terrace

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Martha, Martha, Martha
Martha, Martha, Martha Photo: Dimitrios Kambouris

Bad news for millennials who’ve embraced post-incarceration Martha Stewart as a give-no-fucks, hoverboard-riding icon: Your queen has forsaken you.

In a new interview with Luxury Listings, Stewart dragged millennials, saying:


Now we are finding out that they are living with their parents. They don’t have the initiative to go out and find a little apartment and grow a tomato plant on the terrace. I understand the plight of younger people … The economic circumstances out there are very grim. But you have to work for it. You have to strive for it. You have to go after it …

Ah yes, if only all millennials could see that growing a little tomato plant on their terrace is a practical means of overcoming dire economic circumstances. They might be facing crushing student loan debt, but it’s nothing a fresh caprese salad can’t fix.

But Martha didn’t stop there, adding a paraphrased quote from chef David Chang*: 

They don’t know anything and they have to learn. They want to learn but they have grown up without teachers. They know how to make money and how to develop software, but they don’t know how to plant a tree. They don’t know how to grow spinach.

Teach us, Martha! Or, better yet — adopt us and let us live a life of luxury alongside your exceptionally fluffy cats.

*This post has been corrected to show that the second quote was not directly from Stewart, but rather Stewart paraphrasing David Chang.